Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Inhaling cigarettes can result in dangerous diseases and should be made illegal (against the rules). Smoking has now become a serious concern in this contemporary society, which leads to a major increase in the number of smokers in the world compared to previous years. In this essay, I will discuss the various reasons, their relevant examples, and give my opinion on the topic in the end.

As we know, cigarettes and other kinds of smoking products can lead to various chronic diseases such as respiratory and cardiac diseases. It's a very prominent question of why smokers continue to smoke, despite knowing the consequences of this. According to recent research, one of the vital reasons is that smoking cigarettes can lower stress levels in people and also contains caffeine, which makes them addicted to it. If they don't smoke for 1 or 2 days, they experience an unconsciousness or senseless situation. For instance, my uncle, who smokes a lot he said that he feels relieved whenever he smokes, and if he doesn't smoke for a few days, he turns into a comatose state.

Another essential reason is that among teenagers, it's now becoming common because it's an age when a person's adventure level is at its highest peak. He/ She wants to do anything they want, despite not knowing the worst of it, also affected by bad company. Such as my cousin when he was in his teenage, he was really affected by the bad company.

In my opinion, I agree with the seriousness of smoking, as it is the main root of many dangerous diseases. It leads to cardiac diseases like heart attack, cardiac arrest, and various respiratory diseases like asthma and bronchitis. the excessiveness of somking may also leads to mouth and lung cancer and it shouuld be made illegal by government. Government should provide awareness to people

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt, but the development of ideas is inconsistent. While you state your position, the arguments regarding why smoking should be illegal are somewhat superficial. The claim that cigarettes contain caffeine is factually incorrect, which weakens the credibility of your argument. Furthermore, the personal anecdotes about your uncle and cousin are anecdotal rather than analytical, which is less effective in an academic essay. To reach a higher band, focus on broader societal or economic arguments—such as the burden on public healthcare systems—rather than relying on personal examples. The conclusion is abrupt and lacks a summary of the main points discussed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive. For example, the transition between the introduction and the first body paragraph is basic. Some sentences lack logical flow, such as the transition from discussing stress to the mention of caffeine. Additionally, the referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the second body paragraph where the pronoun 'He/She' is used without a clear antecedent. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'chronic diseases', 'respiratory', and 'cardiac arrest'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and awkward phrasing, such as 'unconsciousness or senseless situation' and 'adventure level'. There are also some spelling errors, such as 'somking' and 'shouuld'. To improve, focus on using more precise academic collocations and ensure that you are using words in the correct context. Expanding your vocabulary to include more sophisticated synonyms for common words will help you move toward a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, they often contain grammatical errors, such as 'my uncle, who smokes a lot he said that he feels relieved' (a run-on/comma splice error) and 'the excessiveness of somking may also leads to'. Subject-verb agreement and punctuation errors are frequent. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like missing articles or incorrect verb forms. Reducing the frequency of these errors is essential for achieving a higher score in this criterion.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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