Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-09-19
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.
To what extent do you agree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Yes ! smoking is a very serious health hazard .This should be illegal as it kills a lot of people every year.
The cigerretes which people consume have clear diagrams of the diesease but the citizens never listen.smoking not only kills the person who does it, but it also acts like a slow poison for other people who stay beside the person who smokes all the time.
on an yearly average the deaths due to cancer are increasing due to smoking. It not only kills the human but also pollutes the environment for example when a tree is burned it is equivalent the a large amount of cigerretes but the people smoke frequently this is a threat to the human kind.
Smoking not only kills the person in the family it also drags the whole family to the street if the person who smoked was the breadwinner for the family. It should be illegal we shoud'nt punish the person who is smoking we have to punish the peron who made him smoke first .
Smoking decreases the fertility rate and also causes mouth cancer which is very painfull. Some families use all their savings to save the person suffering but they would eventually realise that the person will die any way. As I also mentioned in the above paragraph about the threat to the environment due to smoking so by smoking a person is helping to destroy the protective layer of the earth by gloabal warming.
in conclusion, Smoking is really bad for a person as it kills him/her and it should be made illegal but after that the Government should help the civilians by creating rehab's and make sure no one smokes.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt by taking a clear position on whether smoking should be made illegal. The student provides several relevant ideas, such as the health hazards of passive smoking, economic impacts on families, and environmental consequences. However, some arguments are under-developed or contain sweeping over-generalizations, such as comparing the burning of a tree to cigarettes or linking smoking directly to the destruction of the ozone layer through global warming. While the position is understandable, the lack of coherent logical elaboration keeps this performance at Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the organization and progression are weak. Cohesive devices are either misused or absent, resulting in choppy transitions between ideas. For instance, sentences are sometimes fused together without proper punctuation, such as in 'hazard .This should be illegal'. Referencing is also unclear in places, such as 'when a tree is burned it is equivalent the a large amount of cigerretes'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal logical flow within paragraphs lacks smooth connections, aligning with Band 4.0 descriptors.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with several spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'cigerretes', 'diesease', 'gloabal', and 'rehab's'. The student attempts some less common terms like 'fertility rate', 'breadwinner', and 'protective layer', but these are offset by frequent word choice errors and incorrect collocations, such as 'equivalent the a large amount'. These lexical limitations cause noticeable strain for the reader, placing the response squarely at Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar and punctuation is weak. There are frequent punctuation errors, such as missing spaces after periods, uncapitalised beginnings of sentences, and comma splices. Grammatical errors are numerous, including incorrect prepositions and awkward phrasing like 'we shoud'nt punish the person who is smoking we have to punish the peron who made him smoke first'. These errors frequently cause difficulty for the reader and reflect Band 4.0 performance.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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