Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-09-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

smoking of cigarettes and any other devices like that smoker uses all are injurius to human health but also dangurus for those who are not smokers but also sit beside of smokers and inheal smook can also effected by smoking . Smoking also cause serious illnesses to human life and shows bad effects to human body inner features like lungs and also cause to bad breath .

Smoking is most used and expensive poison That people inheal after knowing it can kill them early . I want to talk about those who did not smoke but also effected by it . Those people who sit beside smokers and inheal their smoke randomly . They also faced serious illnes my inhealing that smoke . Firstly , smoking is not good for everyone , pragnent ladies should avoid it , people who made it having a breath problem , their lungs are not working properly , their teeth also broke and facing cavity . One sip of cigarette can remove one day in their life and 24 cigarette in one day also can remove 1 year in their lifes . Socity also faced problems from smoking but not want to quite it . Hospitals are full with patients who smoke .

their is huge amount of cases of those who smoke daily and deals with different kind of diseases but do not want to leave smoking . Smoking give them relaxation that no one give them . if someone feels anxius, depressed , or any kin of feeling that hurts them then to choose to smoke for temporary relaxation . Nicotin is present in cigarette who swollo all their ability of thinking .

that is why we quite to smoking and save the environment and our mental health and take medications .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt by discussing whether smoking should be made illegal and considering passive smoking, health impacts, and psychological reasons for smoking. However, the development of ideas is limited and somewhat repetitive, tending to overgeneralize without deep elaboration. For instance, the mention that 'one sip of cigarette can remove one day in their life' is a weak argument and lacks sophisticated extension. The position is generally clear throughout, advocating for banning smoking due to health and environmental concerns. While all parts of the task are addressed, the arguments lack robust academic support, placing this submission firmly in the band 5 range according to the official descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The essay displays an attempt at logical organisation, moving from health effects on smokers and non-smokers to psychological reasons and a concluding call to action. However, paragraphing is poorly executed, with a single massive second paragraph that mixes multiple distinct ideas such as passive smoking, health problems, and psychological stress. Cohesive devices are minimal, mechanical, or inaccurate, and referencing is frequently unclear (e.g., 'those who made it having a breath problem'). There is no clear overall progression of argument, which causes confusion for the reader. These characteristics align closely with band 4.0 and 4.5 descriptors, meriting a 4.5 score.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.0

The lexical resource is basic and repetitive, frequently impeded by severe spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text. Words like 'injurius' (injurious), 'dangurus' (dangerous), 'inheal' (inhale), 'effected' (affected), 'pragnent' (pregnant), 'anxius' (anxious), and 'quite' (quit) demonstrate a very limited control of vocabulary and spelling. While the writer attempts less common topics related to health and addiction, the numerous errors cause significant strain and difficulty for the reader. This corresponds to the band 4 level, where basic vocabulary and frequent errors impede clear communication of nuances.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and attempts at complex or compound sentences are frequently faulty and ungrammatical. For example, sentences like 'Those people who sit beside smokers and inheal their smoke randomly . They also faced serious illnes my inhealing that smoke' contain severe punctuation and structural issues. There are persistent errors in subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and prepositions ('remove one day in their life', 'deals with different kind of diseases'). Error frequency is very high, causing constant disruption to reading flow. This performance reflects the band 4 descriptors for grammatical range and accuracy.

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