Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.
To what extent do you agree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In recent years, the topic of smoking has gained significant attention. While some people believe that discuss the advantages other argue that disadvantages. This essay will discuss both perspective and present in my opinion.
On the one hand, smoking provides several benefits. Firstly, it improves efficiency and convenience in daily life. Moreover, it saves time and resources. For example many people rely on it to manage their tasks effectively. Therefore, it plays a crucial rule in modern society.
On the other hand, there are certain disadvantages associated with smoking. It can lead to dependency and reduced physical activities. Additionally, it may negatively impact mental and social well-being. For instance excessive use can cause distraction. Hence, it is important to it in a balance manner.
In my opinion, although smoking has some drawbacks, its advantages outweigh the disadvantages. This is because it enhances overall efficiency provides greater opportunity for growth. Additionally, it may negative impact can be minimized.
In conclusion while there are valid arguments on both sides, I believe that smoking is more beneficial as it contribute significantly to development and progress.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, containing only 182 words. This severe under-length prevents the proper development of ideas and results in a partial addressing of the task. Furthermore, the content seems confused or templated, treating the topic of smoking as something that 'improves efficiency and convenience in daily life' and 'saves time and resources,' which demonstrates a misunderstanding of the actual prompt regarding whether smoking causes serious illnesses and should be made illegal. Consequently, the position is unclear and ideas are underdeveloped, corresponding to a Band 4.0 for Task Achievement due to the combination of under-length and limited task coverage.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the logical progression is flawed due to repetitive and nonsensical arguments. Cohesive devices are used mechanically, such as 'On the one hand,' 'On the other hand,' and 'In conclusion,' but these transitions link confused ideas rather than a coherent argument. Referencing is also weak, as seen in phrases like 'important to it in a balance manner.' Overall organisation is heavily impacted by the lack of content development, but paragraphs are at least visually present, placing this performance at Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary is repetitive and basic, relying heavily on words like 'efficiency,' 'advantages,' 'disadvantages,' and 'development.' There are noticeable lexical errors and awkward collocations, such as 'plays a crucial rule' (instead of role), 'reduced physical activities,' and 'negative impact can be minimized' used ungrammatically as 'may negative impact can be minimized.' The range is limited and minimally adequate for expressing basic thoughts, but frequent inaccuracies and awkward phrasing restrict the score to Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The student attempts some complex structures, such as 'While some people believe that discuss the advantages other argue that disadvantages.' However, this sentence and others contain severe grammatical errors, including missing verbs, fragments, and incorrect clause structures. Other examples include 'present in my opinion' and 'it is important to it in a balance manner.' While a few simple sentences are accurate, the frequency of basic grammatical errors and flawed complex sentence attempts places this performance at Band 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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