Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Yes, Smoking can cause of serious illnesses.But from my prospective it's should be illegal besause most the people who addicted to smoking will be 80% of men's and under 18 boys from these boys its addited to the other boys the meets at the end its become big trouble for the nation.Also boys and mens are who's that can run there home expences by there own and large amount of there monthly income.For Example: "From recent month ago that one of my uncle is addicted toward smoking from last 5 to 10 years than shows us how bad this addiction was thay spend around 4 to 5 Doller per week on this than you understand how much its cost from his wallet at the end. Moreover its not an end his son is also doing this because of him. when they know about that they asked him to stop this but they did'nt.After this Uncle wil, know that they are in the one of the bad diesease like Cancer. So, now they understand it not that good he understood it." This is big example for them to keep away from it and teachs Goverment to its should be illegal it in all over the country

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

It is important to note first that the response falls short of the minimum length requirement of 250 words, containing only 205 words, which places a constraint on how fully the topic can be explored. Regarding task coverage, the writer expresses a clear position that smoking should be made illegal due to health and social consequences. However, the ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, the points regarding the impact on household expenses and the intergenerational spread of the habit are introduced but not sufficiently extended with broad societal arguments. Instead, the response relies heavily on a single, narrow personal anecdote about an uncle to support the entire argument. To move to a higher level, the writer needs to expand the word count and develop more generalized supporting arguments that address the proposition from various angles rather than depending on a single example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The organization of the text presents significant challenges, as it lacks clear paragraphing and an overall logical progression. The response is written as a single, dense block of text, which makes it difficult for the reader to follow the flow of ideas. While the writer attempts to use cohesive devices such as 'Also', 'For Example:', and 'Moreover', their application is mechanical and sometimes inaccurate, creating abrupt transitions between sentences. Referencing is also problematic, as pronouns like 'they' and 'them' are used ambiguously without clear antecedents, causing confusion about who is being referred to. To improve, the writer must divide the essay into distinct paragraphs with clear topic sentences and use a wider, more natural variety of logical connectors to guide the reader smoothly through the argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is limited and basic, restricting the writer's ability to discuss the topic with precision. There are numerous lexical and spelling errors that strain the reader's comprehension, such as 'prospective' instead of perspective, 'besause', 'addited', 'mens', 'expences', 'Doller', and 'diesease'. The writer attempts to use some less common words like 'addicted' and 'consequence', but the lack of control over word formation and spelling leads to frequent inaccuracies. Furthermore, collocation is weak, seen in phrases like 'doing this' instead of smoking. To achieve a higher score, the writer needs to expand their range of vocabulary, improve spelling accuracy, and learn the correct collocations and word forms for academic topics.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The grammatical structure of the writing is very limited, relying mostly on simple sentences joined by basic coordinators, while attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty. There are frequent errors in verb forms, tenses, subject-verb agreement, and articles throughout the text, such as 'Smoking can cause of serious illnesses', 'it's should be illegal', 'most the people who addicted', 'men's and under 18 boys', and 'Uncle wil, know'. Punctuation is also poorly managed, with missing apostrophes, run-on sentences, and erratic capitalization. These numerous grammatical errors cause difficulty for the reader and obscure the meaning of several sentences. To progress, the writer must work on mastering basic sentence structures, maintaining consistent tenses, and applying correct grammatical rules for plurals and prepositions.

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