Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-10-05

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

I strongly agree that smoking should be made illegal because it can cause major health problems and also affects people who do not smoke. The reason to support my view point will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs along with suitable examples and conclusion.

To commence with, smoking is cause of various heath disorders. First of all, regular smokers have a high risk of conceive diseases such as lung cancer, heart disease and other respirorty problems. For example, my uncle was regular smoker and he smoke five to six cigaretee every day due to his addiction he suffered with lung cancer and died on 2022.

Therefore, making smoking illegal could protect many people from long term health risks.

Second of all, somking does not effect the smokers it also effect the other people as when passive smokers smoke then the smoke they relese in inhaled by other people, which may lead to various health illness, as a result, they do not take breath easily. For instance, the survey was conducted by World Health Orgnization, which shows 30% pregnant women and 40% children were suffered with heart prolems after taking breath in public places which smoking is using more. However, somking is banned in public places.

In conclusion, although a complete ban of smoking may be difficult to implement immediately, but the government should take action on those people who smoke it on public places. I strongly support the idea of making smoking increasingly restricted and eventually illegal because of its serious effect on health.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your response addresses all parts of the task by presenting a clear position that smoking should be made illegal due to health risks and passive smoking, meeting the criteria for a solid band six while successfully reaching into the next band. Your main ideas are relevant and supported with explanations and examples, such as the personal anecdote about your uncle and the mention of World Health Organization data regarding vulnerable populations. However, some ideas remain slightly under-developed rather than fully extended throughout the essay. For example, the point about passive smokers struggling to breathe and the survey statistics are stated but could be expanded further with more precise analysis to truly reach the higher descriptors. Overall, your clear overall position and relevant main arguments demonstrate a commendable effort that fully covers the core prompt requirements while showing flashes of more fully realized support.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

Your essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction and conclusion, and you use basic paragraphing to structure your thoughts effectively. You employ cohesive devices such as 'To commence with', 'Second of all', and 'In conclusion' to guide the reader through your arguments. However, cohesion at times feels a bit mechanical or repetitive, which is characteristic of this level. For instance, the transition 'Second of all' is somewhat unnatural compared to standard academic alternatives like 'Furthermore' or 'In addition'. Additionally, referencing within the text could be smoother, as some sentences are loosely linked. To achieve a higher band, you should aim for a more sophisticated range of cohesive devices that integrate your ideas fluidly without relying on formulaic transitions, ensuring that every sentence flows naturally into the next with precise logical progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items and attempting to discuss complex health themes. However, your writing contains noticeable word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors that occasionally impede communication or distract the reader. For example, you use phrases like 'high risk of conceive diseases' instead of 'contract diseases', and there are several spelling mistakes throughout the text, including 'heath' instead of 'health', 'resropirty' instead of 'respiratory', and 'somking' instead of 'smoking'. Furthermore, words like 'cigaretee' and 'Orgnization' show minor lapses in precision. To improve your lexical score to the next level, you need to expand your control of less common vocabulary, ensure accurate word formation and collocations, and eliminate recurrent spelling errors by carefully proofreading your final piece.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating a willingness to construct longer, multi-clause sentences such as conditional and relative structures. However, your writing contains frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that can occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. There are notable issues with verb tenses and forms, such as 'he smoke five to six cigaretee' instead of 'smoked', and agreement issues like 'children were suffered' instead of 'suffered'. Prepositions inside grammatical patterns and article usage also need attention, as seen in 'after taking breath in public places which smoking is using more'. To reach a higher band, you must increase your proportion of error-free sentences by exercising greater control over verb forms, subject-verb agreement, and complex clause structures, ensuring your grammatical control remains reliable throughout.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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