Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Over the recent few decades, individuals consume those commodities which are very bad for their health. Therefore, smoking is one of the major consuming factor among people which can arise serious health problems, thus it is the responsibity of government to banned it in the society. I totally agree with the given statement and discuss my viewpoints in the upcoming paragraphs.

To commence with, the reason why it should be banned. First and formost, due to easy availability and affordability make youngsters to buy unhealthy commodities the most which can harm their overall growth and development. To explain it, as youngsters are the backbone of nation so, it is very bad for them to consume on daily basis. As a result, they may face health issues such as asthma and cancer. Another reason is that teenagers are highly influenced by their peers so they should teach about its drawbacks by their family, teachers and society. It will save their life for the future time.

Moreover, it creats offence in the society. To elaborate it, people who consume unhealthy items are highly offensive and they do not tolerate others. Thus, it is very easy for them to hurt anyone. Resultantly, it may arise wars among society which affects economy of the nation. In addition, unemployment is the main cause of arising this issue because youngsters who are highly educated are not having preffered jobs which encourage them to unlawful activities to survive in the nation. So, regime should show more interest to provide jobs which helps youngsters to busy in work which help them to away from wrong practicies.

In conclusion, it is very crucial to made smoking illegal so that it help in betterment of the society as well as it encorage youngsters to do work to complete their needs. It is the responsibilty of authorities to make society clean and happier.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear in the introduction and conclusion: you agree that smoking should be made illegal. You also give reasons, including health risks to young people and the influence of peers. However, the response only partly addresses the task because several points are general or do not explain why smoking itself should be illegal. The claim that smokers are “highly offensive” and may cause “wars among society” is not convincingly connected to smoking, and the discussion of unemployment and unlawful activities moves away from the question. Develop fewer, more relevant arguments—for example, second-hand smoke, pressure on healthcare services, or the limits of age restrictions—and explain how each supports your position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Sequencing phrases such as “To commence with,” “Moreover,” and “In conclusion” help signal stages of the argument. However, progression within the body paragraphs is uneven: the second paragraph shifts from smoking to offence, conflict, unemployment and jobs, so the links between ideas are difficult to follow. Some connectors are also used mechanically, and references such as “it” in “it is very easy for them to hurt anyone” are not fully clear. Keep each paragraph focused on one main reason, then use a clear explanation or example to connect supporting sentences to that reason.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “affordability,” “health problems,” “drawbacks,” and “unlawful activities,” and the main message is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the argument unclear. For example, “major consuming factor” does not express the prevalence of smoking, while “creats offence” and “arise wars among society” are difficult to interpret in context. Spelling errors such as “responsibity,” “formost,” and “practicies” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of expressions for discussing smoking and public health, and check spelling and collocations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use some longer sentence forms and attempt to explain causes and results, but control is inconsistent. Several sentences contain faulty structures, such as “due to easy availability and affordability make youngsters to buy,” where the opening phrase does not connect grammatically to the main clause. Other examples include “it is the responsibibilty of government to banned it” and “it help in betterment,” which show problems with verb forms and agreement. Sentence boundaries and punctuation also need attention, particularly in “as youngsters are the backbone of nation so,” where the clauses are joined awkwardly. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses while checking subject–verb agreement, articles and verb forms.

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