Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-10-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Studies show that smoking in the leading cause of lung cancer, yet people still smoke and willingly damage their future. But why?

Smoking can cause serious ilness and should be made illegal, but first we need to understand why people smoke. Some do so because of peer pressure or to look cool infront of thier peers, while some do it to release stress. Other than obvious health issues that smoking presents, passive smoking also exposes non-smokers to involuntary health risks.

Once diagnosed with major issues, treatment can cause patients significant financial strains and cause massive panic amongst family members and friends, hence the motto in my home, "Smoking is expensive".

However, completely banning and making smoking illegal may just reduce smokers for a small peroid, eventually this will lead to massive under the table sales, increasing organized crime group numbers and their power in orchestrating illegal sales. This may occur as people will still be willing to purchase from different sources that may be producing even more harmful ciggarettes, ones that could hold even more health hazards.

In conclusion, governments should make smoking illegal but with utmost saftey measures that prevent after sales and illegal manufacturing, even from small producers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address the question and give a position: smoking should be illegal, while recognising that prohibition could create an illicit market. The points about passive smoking, health costs and illegal sales are relevant, and the counterargument shows some consideration of consequences. However, the reasons for smoking are listed rather than explored, and the claim that a ban would increase organised crime is not supported with an example or explanation. Your conclusion adds the condition of “utmost safety measures” but does not clarify how these would work or resolve the tension between banning smoking and preventing illegal sales. The response is also 50 words below the required minimum, limiting the space available to develop and support your ideas. Extend the main arguments with specific reasoning or examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, discussion of reasons and harms, a counterargument, and a conclusion. The shift signalled by “However” helps distinguish the risks of prohibition from the health arguments, and “In conclusion” makes the ending clear. Some connections are less smooth or precise, though. The opening “But why?” is not directly answered until the next paragraph, and the sentence beginning “Once diagnosed” moves quickly from illness to financial strain and family panic without showing the links between these effects. The final position also seems to change from arguing against a complete ban to supporting illegality with safeguards. Use clearer paragraph development and explain how each point leads to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “passive smoking,” “involuntary health risks,” “financial strains,” and “under the table sales.” These choices help communicate the main ideas, and the meaning is generally clear. There are some spelling and word-choice inaccuracies, such as “ilness,” “thier,” “ciggarettes,” and “saftey,” which reduce accuracy. A few expressions are also imprecise or informal for an academic essay: “look cool,” “massive panic,” and “small peroid.” Aim for more precise collocations and a consistently formal register—for example, describe peer influence as a reason for taking up smoking, and refer to illicit sales or an illegal market rather than “under the table sales.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including a subordinate clause in “Once diagnosed with major issues” and a conditional structure in “This may occur as people will still be willing to purchase.” Most sentences communicate their meaning, and the use of commas and linking words generally supports readability. Some grammatical and punctuation problems remain. The opening says “smoking in the leading cause,” where the verb form should be “is”; “Smoking can cause serious ilness and should be made illegal” also needs a plural noun. The long sentence beginning “However, completely banning…” joins two independent clauses with a comma, creating a comma splice. Review agreement, articles and sentence boundaries, and divide long sentences where needed.

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