Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

As we read in books and Watches at the subtitles of TV dramas, Smoking is injurious to health. Becasue it causes serious illnesses and dangerous for health. It slowly destroys the lungs which are our oxygen exporting hub, due to which person can't easily intake oxygen. It is all due to presence of various carcinogens which are very injurous. Smoking is now spreading as a most spreading disease in schools, colleges also in universities, due to which the career of young nation is in danger. As it is easily available in shops near the schools, colleges, and universities. If i thing is easily in access of a common person, would be hunted easily. There are also various areas where tobacco is a crop and they harvest. There is no doubt that this is a cashcrop but what about its consequences. Many youngers smoke daily due to which their health is going down also money. Our Government is generating revenue from it and also increasing taxes yearly but not thinking about youth. Governemnt should make it illegal all over the country specially near the schools, colleges and universites as the CM of Tamilnadu did. Government should take this as a challenge because the young nation is the builder of the nation. If they betrayed towards wrong side, the progress of the country would be collapsed. So, Government should take serious actions about the harvesters, dealers and those companies who sponsers this. If this became illegal, the young nation would do efforts for the progress of the country.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you agree that smoking should be made illegal, and you give relevant reasons, including health damage, young people’s access to tobacco, and the government’s revenue from its sale. The reference to restrictions near educational institutions also helps connect your argument to a possible response. However, some points are asserted rather than explained. For example, the claim that smoking is “spreading” in schools and universities would be stronger with a specific example or explanation of its effects. The discussion of tobacco farming and national progress is relevant but its link to a complete ban is not fully developed. Explain why prohibition would work better than tighter sales restrictions, and support your main reasons more fully.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response follows a broadly understandable line: it introduces the health risk, discusses young smokers and tobacco production, and ends with a call for government action. However, it is presented as one long paragraph, so the reader has little visual guidance through these different stages of the argument. Several connections are also abrupt: “There are also various areas where tobacco is a crop” shifts from youth access to farming without explaining the relationship, while “If this became illegal” does not clearly specify what “this” refers to. Organise the essay into an introduction, separate body paragraphs for health and policy arguments, and a conclusion. Use clear topic sentences and more precise referencing to make the progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “carcinogens,” “revenue,” “consequences,” and “harvesters,” which helps communicate the subject. Some less common terms are used inaccurately or in unnatural combinations, however: “oxygen exporting hub,” “most spreading disease,” and “young nation” do not express your intended meanings clearly. Spelling errors such as “Becasue,” “injurous,” “Governemnt,” and “universites” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, describe smoking as a “widespread problem” and refer to “young people” rather than “young nation.” This would make your argument clearer and more appropriate for an academic essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because,” “which,” and “if.” Some sentences communicate their meaning, but errors in sentence construction and grammatical control are noticeable. “Because it causes serious illnesses and dangerous for health” is a fragment and needs a main clause; “If i thing is easily in access” also has an unclear and faulty structure. There are problems with articles, agreement, and verb forms, as in “the career of young nation is in danger” and “the progress of the country would be collapsed.” Use complete sentences, check that each clause has a subject and verb, and practise conditional forms. More accurate control of these structures would make your reasoning easier to understand.

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