Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-10-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The smoke can spread my diseases and it is very dangerous of human beings. Smoke is very common factor of serious illnesses and polluted the environment. I am totally agree with this extent because this is very serious issue and effects the people healths. Smoke should be made illegal for the benefits of population health and his living long life.

To the begin with, most of the factories constructed in residental area and these factories and the bigger machinery for working the somke of these factories is very dangerous for the serious health issue for living the humans and other living beings, the dark dangerous smoke can causes serious illnesses issuses, i.e mostly this dangeour can effect the lungs and any other human organs.

Furthermore, the problem in urban cities the too much smoke of heavy traffic can also the major problem of urban people this also dangerous the human health and effect the health of urban people. in modern era the smoke is very big problem of humans and the other livings

Moreover, smoke not only effect the humans this can also effect the atmosphere and the climate change. with the dangerous smoke the oxygen is more effective, smoke can effect all over the world.

in conclusion the smoke is very dangerous all over the world and also effect the atmosphere and can reduce the oxygen from atmosphere. I compeletly

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a clear view that smoking should be illegal, and you give relevant points about health, traffic, factories, and environmental harm. However, the response addresses the question only minimally: it does not explain why making smoking illegal is the right solution, distinguish smoking from factory or vehicle emissions, or develop a specific example. Several claims, such as smoke reducing oxygen, are asserted without explanation. The final sentence is unfinished, which also leaves the conclusion incomplete. The response contains 231 words, so it does not meet the required minimum of 250. To strengthen the answer, explain the effects of smoking on people and give reasons and support for the proposed legal ban, while keeping the discussion focused on smoking itself.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: an opening position is followed by paragraphs introduced with “To the begin with,” “Furthermore,” and “Moreover,” and a concluding paragraph is attempted. This gives the reader a general sense of the response’s structure. However, the ideas do not progress clearly from the question to supporting reasons, and the links between smoking, factory emissions, traffic pollution, and climate change are not explained. Connectors are repetitive and sometimes awkward, while the paragraph about urban traffic ends without a developed point. The unfinished final sentence further weakens the ending. For clearer progression, give each body paragraph one focused reason, explain how it supports your position, and use linking phrases only where they show a genuine relationship between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “serious illnesses,” “factories,” “heavy traffic,” “atmosphere,” and “climate change,” so the general subject is usually identifiable. However, the vocabulary is basic and repetitive, especially repeated uses of “smoke,” “dangerous,” and “effect.” Several word choices or forms make meaning difficult to follow, as in “spread my diseases,” “the bigger machinery,” and “the oxygen is more effective.” Spelling errors such as “residental,” “somke,” and “dangeour” also reduce clarity. Aim for more precise terms and accurate collocations, such as “cause respiratory diseases” or “air pollution,” and avoid repeating the same general adjectives when a specific description is available.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts some longer sentences and uses basic structures to state a position and add reasons. However, grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes distort meaning. For example, “I am totally agree” has an incorrect verb form, while “factories constructed in residental area” lacks a clear verb and article. Agreement and sentence construction are also problematic in “the dark dangerous smoke can causes” and “this also dangerous the human health.” Punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, and the final sentence is incomplete. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine related ideas with clauses such as “because” or “which.” Check subject–verb agreement, articles, and complete sentence boundaries during revision.

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