Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-11-04

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Smoking can cause serious illnesses and should be made illegal.

To what extent do you agree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Smoking is injurious to health, I am not giving this statement simply because I have seen that on televisionn and Social Media but I can support this claim by the study. As a biological student, I have studied in detail how smoking can affect the lungs of the smokers. According to recent research, Nicotine in the Smoke of the Cigrattes can cause serious problems with the respiratory system. The smoker may feel mild to severe symptoms such as shortness of breath,Chest pain and fatigue. All these symptoms can eventually lead to more serious circumstances such as lungs cancer.

Moreover, I have personally observed that the people who smoke frequently are more likely to have heart diseases. Taking my family as an example, I have two uncles who smoke habitually and both of them have developed heart problems. They often face the problems of hypertension. Although it not a rule of thumb that the only reason must be the smoking, there might be some other factors as well such as genetic disorders and environmental factors as well. But it is very clear by the scientific research and evidences, that smoking works like oil on the fire. It can enhance the respiratory and cardiovascular problems already present.

I have personally seen people becoming addicted to smoking just because of the reason that smoking helps them to release their stress. They are not aware of the harmful effects it may have in the long run. They just enjoy the timely pleasure.

There is a need that smoking must be made illegsl, the reason is that many young students are also smoking just because of trends and social impact. Some people do not even hesitate to smoke in the public places, because thyey do not see it as an illegal act. If smoking is made illegal it will stop people to do it openly and all the time.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you support making smoking illegal, and you give relevant reasons about serious health effects, addiction, and young people taking up smoking. The examples about your uncles and students help connect the argument to real situations. However, the response develops the health risks much more fully than the case for prohibition. The final paragraph says illegality would stop people smoking openly, but does not consider whether a ban would be enforceable or whether other measures might work better. Some claims, such as smoking causing lung cancer, are relevant but would benefit from clearer explanation and support. Develop the policy argument as fully as the health argument, and make the extent of your agreement explicit in a concluding statement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a generally coherent sequence: it moves from respiratory effects to heart problems, addiction, and finally the proposed ban. Paragraph breaks help distinguish these main points, and linking expressions such as “Moreover” and “Although” show relationships between ideas. At times, however, the progression within paragraphs is less controlled. The first paragraph moves quickly from symptoms to cancer, while the second combines a family example, qualifications, and a general research claim. Some links are also mechanical or unclear, particularly the repeated use of “as well” and the transition from addiction to the need for a ban. Organise each paragraph around one main claim, then explain and illustrate it before moving on; a brief conclusion would also give the argument a clearer finish.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a relevant range of topic vocabulary, including “respiratory system,” “cardiovascular problems,” “hypertension,” and “addicted,” which helps communicate the subject. There are also attempts at more expressive phrasing, such as “oil on the fire” and “timely pleasure.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “lungs cancer,” “release their stress,” and “stop people to do it.” Spelling errors such as “Cigrattes,” “illegsl,” and “thyey” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, natural combinations rather than translated or informal expressions, and proofread carefully. More consistent control of spelling and collocation would make your vocabulary more effective and flexible.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a concession in “Although it not a rule of thumb…” and a conditional idea about making smoking illegal. Most of the meaning remains understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in sentence construction, verb forms, articles, and punctuation. For example, “Although it not a rule of thumb” needs a verb, and “the only reason must be the smoking” has an awkward grammatical structure. The opening sentence is a comma splice, while “shortness of breath,Chest pain” needs clearer punctuation. Practise forming accurate subordinate clauses and checking sentence boundaries, articles, and verb patterns. Greater control of these structures would let you express your ideas with the complexity you are already attempting.

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