Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

All the living species should have freedom as it is a birth right to have. I think we don't need any zoos to keep animals ensalved and keeping away from their habitat rather then putting them in a cage for our own amusment. If so humans does not need any zoos as it can be closed and the particular property can be use for the developments that we actully need.

On one hand, animals that are in a zoo is not necesarilly born in the cage as they were hunted down and taken away from their families mostly from forest. It has a negative impact on enviorment as animals lose their natural habitat and can be more aggrasive than its actual nature. putting an animal in a cage means one can n ot maintain balance of its nature of food consumption and other habits the particular animal might have in the forest. As an animal loses its instinct its offsprings can have genetically alteration. For example, Tigers who born in a zoo and those who born in forest in nature have significsantly diffrence in their overall behavior and instinct.

On the other hand, keeping wild animals in a tiny cage for our own entertainment is morally wrong as we are taking away rights from an animal to show our supiriority against other species. As zoo owners become rich buy profitearing through enslavement, it should be a crime as humans abolished the law of keeping slaves. Moreover, human should be kind toward animals because humans have a certain sense of morality and emparthy while staying at the top of the food chain.

Some might argue that, zoos are used for not only entertainment purpose but also for study and research purposes as children can learn about animals or have a vacation where they can be relaxed from their academic pressure. But nowadays, we can learn about diffrent species from home with a cell phone or a laptop via numeras website through internet and gain knowledge. One good solution to this, governments should make suffary parks more available and the property that used for making a zoo should it can be used to builld a park so that birds and some sort of animals can live freely in tress and within the nature.

In conclusion, however supirior we are to animals its not morally right to put any animals to a cage in a zoo for entertainment or any other purpose and zoos should be close or government had to take action against it atleast.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by presenting a clear position agreeing that zoos should be closed, which is maintained throughout the essay. Relevant ideas are presented, such as the moral implications of animal captivity, the availability of alternative educational resources like the internet, and the potential to convert zoo properties into wildlife parks. However, some ideas remain under-developed or briefly stated, reflecting a standard characteristic of a solid six with elements reaching into the higher band. For instance, the point regarding the environmental impact of taking animals from forests is introduced but lacks deeper elaboration with specific consequences. To reach the next level, the writer needs to extend and fully develop all supporting arguments with more comprehensive explanations and detailed examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used to separate distinct arguments, such as the impact on animals, ethical concerns, and alternatives to zoos. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen in repetitive transitional phrases like 'On one hand' and 'On the other hand' which are also somewhat misapplied given that there are more than two opposing viewpoints. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and logical progression within paragraphs could be smoother. To achieve higher bands, the writer should employ a wider and more flexible range of cohesive devices without repetition, ensuring seamless transitions between sentences and ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'enslaved', 'profiteering', and 'empathy'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors throughout the text, including spelling mistakes like 'ensalved', 'amusment', 'actully', 'enviorment', 'aggrasive', 'numeras', 'suffary', and 'supirior'. Word choice and word formation inaccuracies also occur, such as 'genetically alteration' instead of 'genetic alteration', 'buy profiteering' instead of 'by profiteering', and 'birds and some sort of animals'. While communication is generally maintained despite these errors, the frequent spelling and word-choice lapses prevent the response from achieving a higher lexical band. Improving spelling accuracy and precision in word collocation is essential for progression.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting complex structures such as conditional clauses ('If so humans does not need any zoos as it can be closed') and relative clauses. However, there are frequent errors in grammar, punctuation, and agreement that cause difficulty for the reader. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('human should be kind', 'zoos should be close'), article misuse ('in the forest' versus 'in forest'), and awkward syntactic constructions ('the property that used for making a zoo should it can be used'). Punctuation errors and run-on sentences also occur, particularly in the conclusion. To improve, the student needs to exercise greater control over basic sentence patterns, verb forms, and grammatical agreements, while reducing the frequency of errors in complex structures.

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