Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Academic Practice Accelerator · 2026-10-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

We no longer need to have animals kept in zoos, so zoos should be closed.

Do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In this contemporary era of modernisation, people do not need zoos to keep animals, so zoos ought ot be closed. I strongly agree with this notion because animals also have their freedom to live free inn jungle. The mentioned statement will be discussed in the upcoming paragraphs along with relevant examples from my point of view.

To commence with, animals also have their liberty to live free in forest along with their kith and kin. To elucidate, it very vital for every living organism to live freely with their family members as well as with their friends, animals also have freedom to live freely in forest along with their kith and kin. For instance, it is susbtantially crucial for every living thing to live in their free space, not in the decided place my authorities. Thus, animals also have their liberty to live freely in free space.

Shifting attention towards the second point, zoos should be closed. To explicate, zoos ought to be closed in the upcoming decades owing to, zoo is a type of jail for every animal who was locked in decided space of government. Animals lost their freedom to live by their own wish, while residing at small place or in a cage. To exemplify, it is a kind offence that did by higher authorities to took the liberty of an animal. Hence, causes arise after putting an animal in a cage.

In conclusion, I strongly in the favour of zoo closing due to, every animal also have their freedom to live free at forest; in addtion, not in decided space that was given by higher authorities to an animal.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

Your position is clear: you strongly agree that zoos should close, and both body paragraphs relate to animals’ freedom and captivity. However, the response develops the task only partially. The main points repeat the same claim—that animals should live freely with their families—rather than explaining distinct consequences or considering what zoos currently do. For example, the claim that a zoo is “a type of jail” is asserted but not supported with a specific example or explanation of its effects. The introduction promises relevant examples, but the examples remain general. To strengthen the response, explain the reasoning behind your position and support it with concrete evidence, such as how captivity affects animal welfare or how sanctuaries could provide an alternative.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposts such as “To commence with” and “In conclusion” help identify each section. The overall progression is understandable: it moves from animals’ freedom to the claim that zoos should close. However, cohesion is often mechanical, and ideas within paragraphs are repetitive rather than progressively developed. The first body paragraph repeats the point about living freely with family several times, while “Thus” simply restates it. Some links are also unclear, as in “Hence, causes arise after putting an animal in a cage,” where the relationship to the preceding point is incomplete. Use fewer formulaic transitions and make each sentence add a new, clearly connected reason or example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “liberty,” “freedom,” “cage” and “authorities,” and attempts such as “elucidate” show an effort to use less common language. However, the usable range is limited by repeated words and phrases, especially “freedom,” “live freely” and “decided space.” Several choices are inaccurate or unnatural, such as “kith and kin,” “a kind offence” and “in the favour of zoo closing,” which can make the intended meaning less clear. There are also spelling errors, including “ot,” “susbtantially” and “addtion.” Aim for precise, natural collocations rather than formal-sounding expressions, and proofread spelling. More varied terms for captivity, animal welfare and conservation would help express your ideas more clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentence forms, and the reader can generally identify your main position. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. For example, “it very vital” is missing a verb, while “every living organism … their family members” has agreement and pronoun problems. In “zoos ought to be closed … owing to, zoo is a type of jail,” the clause after the linking phrase is not formed correctly. The conclusion also has an incomplete construction: “I strongly in the favour.” Practise building accurate subject–verb sentences first, then connect them with subordinate clauses. Check articles, agreement, verb forms and punctuation when editing.

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