Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

It is certainly true that most of the primary schools tend to focus more on formal learning. I completely agree with this statement because primary school is the time for learning not only acedmically but also non-formal learning.

While, few people argue that the undergraduate primary school only focus on acedmic learning. focusing only on acedmics may lead to less interest shown by the students. pupils may find it boring to learn same things. Children will not be able to learn those skills that are actually useful in daily-life. Therefore schools should start teaching some self-defence skills and help to improve communication skills. Teaching new playing games in classroom will engage more students in classroom. For instance, In India, many primary schools have L.E.Ds in classrooms to engage children in studies.

From my prospective, playing is as important as learning. Due

to the fact that in secondary school the pressure of studies will increase that the children may lack too in behind in other skills. Playing makes the student more active and it is very crucial for child's overall development not only physically but also mentally. The student learn new skills and also become more stronger physically.

In conclusion, even though

In Conclusion, Individuals argue that the primary schools often focus on only acedmic learning .I agree with this statement. even though learning and studies are important for child's future but playing and having fun is equally necessary for pupil's mental health and development. Teaching skills that are really helpful in daily life helps to improve child's learning ability.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 3.0

The response is largely off-topic. The prompt asks for a discussion on the impact of tourism on local cultures and the environment, but the essay focuses entirely on primary school education and the balance between academic and non-academic learning. Because the student has completely failed to address the specific topic provided, the response cannot be assessed as a relevant answer to the task. While the student maintains a position regarding education, it is irrelevant to the prompt. Consequently, the response fails to address the requirements of the task.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression is weak. The introduction is confusing, and the conclusion is repetitive, with the phrase 'In Conclusion' appearing twice. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Therefore' and 'For instance', but they are often used to connect ideas that do not logically follow the prompt. The referencing is sometimes unclear, and the overall structure is disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the intended argument. Paragraphing is present but lacks a clear, logical flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. There are frequent spelling errors, such as 'acedmically', 'acedmic', and 'prospective' (used instead of 'perspective'). The range of vocabulary is insufficient to discuss complex topics, relying on basic terms like 'learning', 'playing', and 'skills'. While the meaning is generally conveyed, the lack of precision and the repeated spelling mistakes hinder the overall quality of the writing. The student struggles to use less common lexical items accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Examples include 'the undergraduate primary school only focus' (subject-verb agreement), 'the children may lack too in behind' (incorrect phrasing), and 'the student learn new skills' (subject-verb agreement). Punctuation is also problematic, with erratic capitalization and spacing issues, such as the mid-sentence break in the final paragraph. These errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding of the intended meaning.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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