Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

we have seen recently that tourism rise so fast, but there some people think that tourism can be bad impact for cultures and enviromant on the country,but i think there rong becous tourism can be a good inflounse for the people and govarmant .

govermant can use tourism for get mony for exampel tourism pay tax and with that mony can provide mor job or fix the roud pr build bulding and also for socielty can creates mor empoyment .

and for enviroment we can use the mony that we get from tourisme for protacte nateur and build green place for people to relax or park for kids all this is going to be good for the country.

and also we dont forget the importan thing cultures , evry country has thier specifick tradition and that wath make it special becous people want to descourve and learn new thing and when the going to find somting intiresing on that country like musiqe or food or clouthes their will going to love it and make the country famous and that also main mor mony and rised on economies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response attempts to address the prompt regarding the positive and negative impacts of tourism on economies, cultures, and the environment. You state a clear position that tourism is beneficial and not damaging, supporting this with ideas related to government revenue, job creation, and cultural exchange. However, your ideas remain largely underdeveloped due to the extremely limited length of the essay, containing only 187 words, which falls well short of the mandatory 250-word minimum. Furthermore, the discussion on cultural damage is somewhat superficial and fails to thoroughly weigh the counter-argument presented in the task. Because the length requirement is not met, the Task Achievement score is heavily penalised, placing it firmly in the lower bands despite the presence of a central thesis.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The text is structured into four paragraphs, which shows some rudimentary awareness of essay organisation, attempting an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion-like final paragraph. However, logical progression is weak and ideas are clumped together into long, run-on sentences without adequate punctuation. Cohesive devices are minimal and repetitive, relying heavily on connectors like 'and also' and 'becous' to link clauses. Paragraphing is rudimentary, and referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult to follow the flow of argument seamlessly. While there is an overall attempt to arrange ideas logically, the execution lacks the control and flexibility required for higher band levels.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is very basic, repetitive, and heavily constrained. You repeatedly use words like 'mony', 'country', and 'tourism' throughout the response. There are numerous severe spelling errors across common words, such as 'enviromant' for environment, 'rong' for wrong, 'inflounse' for influence, 'govarmant' for government, 'empoyment' for employment, 'nateur' for nature, 'musiqe' for music, and 'clouthes' for clothes. These spelling and word-choice errors are pervasive and frequently strain the reader's understanding. There is little evidence of less common lexical items or appropriate collocations, keeping the vocabulary range quite limited and minimally adequate at best.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

Grammatically, the response is restricted to very simple sentence structures joined together by coordinating conjunctions, resulting in long, unpunctuated run-on sentences. When you attempt complex or compound structures, they are almost invariably faulty, as seen in phrases like 'some people think that tourism can be bad impact for cultures and enviromant on the country,but i think there rong becous tourism can be a good inflounse'. Punctuation is largely neglected, with comma splices and missing periods appearing frequently. Verb tense consistency and subject-verb agreement are also problematic. Because errors are extremely frequent and impede communication throughout the text, the grammar reflects a low-level profile.

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