Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

With the advancement in technology, the field of tourism have also nurtured and contributed to the economy of world in diffrent ways. Although the department of tourism have increased the GDP of countries, helped them overcome poverty and promote their heritage, I belive that the damage it have caused to the local culture, infrastructure and in enviroment is of grave importance.

It is true that tourism plays a crucial role in balancing money imbalance and importing wealth from other regions into the country. It is can also be a great way for estableshing friendly terms with other nations. For instance, when the department of foriegn tourism was found in Pakistan, it not only accounted in the overall economy but also attracted more tourists by making various improvments. However, it have influenced the local culture and sorroundings, threatning the heritage of these localities.

In many under-developing countries, there are no proper guides or facilities to help these tourists or to look after the important tourism sites. For example, many natural popular sites for travelling in pakistan such as naran kaghan and valley of hunza are polluted by the garbage thrown by the travellers. This litter not only effects the overall beauty of these meadows but also harm the biodiversity like polluting the water of rivers which harms the aquatic life.

Furthermore, the local people and their culture can get influenced by the clothing and lifestyle of the visitors resulting in the loss of ancient heritage. Another noteable disadvantage is that the lack of survilliance on important travelling locations can harm the infrastructure if it gets too crowded by tourists, which can effect the native communities.

In conclusion. I would say that the deparment of tourism should make important steps to save the traditions and local biodiversity of important travelling sites. Improvments should be made to make tourism more peaceful, clea and enviroment friendly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you acknowledge tourism’s economic benefits but argue that its cultural and environmental damage is serious. You address both sides and support your concerns with relevant examples, particularly litter at Naran Kaghan and Hunza and its effects on rivers and aquatic life. This gives the response a sound, task-focused foundation. However, some points are less fully developed than others. The claim that visitors’ clothing and lifestyles can erode heritage is asserted without a specific example or explanation of how this happens, and the infrastructure point is also brief. To strengthen the response, explain these effects more precisely and connect each example directly to your overall judgement about the extent of the damage. Your conclusion offers a practical recommendation, but could restate your degree of agreement more explicitly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, the body paragraphs develop economic benefits and then environmental and cultural concerns, and the conclusion gives a recommendation. Paragraphing helps the reader follow this progression, and transitions such as “Furthermore” and “In conclusion” signal changes in focus. Some connections are less smooth or precise, however. The second paragraph moves from economic benefits to cultural damage quite abruptly, while “Another noteable disadvantage” introduces infrastructure without clearly linking it to the preceding cultural point. The opening phrase “It is true” also does not clearly signal that this paragraph is presenting the opposing benefit. Use more specific topic sentences and clearer links between claims and examples, and ensure the conclusion follows directly from the position established in the introduction.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “GDP,” “heritage,” “biodiversity,” “aquatic life,” and “native communities.” These choices help communicate the subject and show some ambition beyond basic vocabulary. However, inaccurate word choice, collocation, and spelling are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning less clear. For example, “balancing money imbalance” and “importing wealth” do not express the economic point naturally; “effects” is used where “affects” is needed, and “clea” appears to be a misspelling. There are also repeated spelling errors in words such as “environment,” “improvements,” and “surveillance.” Build accuracy by checking spelling and learning common collocations as complete phrases, especially for describing economic benefits, environmental harm, and tourism management.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a concession in the opening (“Although…”) and a relative clause describing the litter’s effects. These attempts help organise your reasoning, but control is uneven: errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction occur across the response and sometimes make the reader pause. Examples include “the field of tourism have,” “the department of tourism have increased,” and “It is can also be,” where the verb pattern or agreement is faulty. The sentence beginning “This litter not only…” also shifts from “litter” to plural effects without maintaining accurate agreement. Review subject–verb agreement and auxiliary verb patterns, then proofread each sentence for a complete, correctly formed clause. Greater accuracy in these areas would make your complex ideas easier to follow.

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