Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored.

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Tourism plays a cruical role in the growth of the any country. If the country have a great GDP, they must focus on their tourism industry. The country who have not focus on their tourism industries they no grow faster. The demage tourism is causes the local culture of the country.

When the tourism is common in any country they will generate profit from this industries and also promote the local culture of the country and also collebrate with others countries people.

For example, Turkey have a great tourist place to visit and around thousands people will visit Turkey as a tourist they explore the different places and also spend the money while they visit different places. Mostly part of their GDP is depend on the tourism.

Some people agree from this statement that the demage tourism can causes to local cultures because when the people not come in your country for tourism they will demage the local culture and also demage the GDP of the country. They will not attract with the other contries people.

For exapmle, Iran was a great country to visit but now a days the current situation of Iran is not stable due to War thats they people will not go as a tourist.

In my opinion, i m totally agree with this statement that tourism is one of the fastest growing industries. Government has also focued on the tourist places and they know that the tourism indusry is the fastest industries of any country which countribute in the GDP.

For example, Pakistan have aloat of places to visit and aloat of international people will visit in the vacations. The local industry will also grown they will gave the opportunity to the unemployed people and also run the business of the hotels etc.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You address tourism’s economic contribution and give examples involving Turkey and Pakistan, so the response is related to the topic. However, the task asks whether you agree that tourism’s damage to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. Your position is unclear: you write “I m totally agree,” but appear to agree that tourism is a fast-growing industry, rather than clearly addressing whether its harms are ignored. Environmental damage is not discussed, and cultural damage is mentioned without a clear explanation or supporting example. The Iran example concerns war and reduced tourism, not tourism’s effects. To strengthen the response, state your position on the specific claim and develop relevant reasons and examples about cultural and environmental impacts.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response is divided into paragraphs and uses basic linking expressions such as “For example,” “When,” and “In my opinion,” which gives the reader some signposting. However, ideas are not arranged in a coherent line of argument: the opening moves from GDP to tourism, then to cultural damage, while later paragraphs shift between tourism’s benefits, war, and employment. Some connections are unclear, particularly the claim that people who do not visit a country will damage its culture. Repeated use of “also” and “for example” does not establish how each point supports your position. Organise the essay around a clear argument, with each paragraph developing one relevant reason and its example, and use references that make the relationships between ideas explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use a basic range of topic-related vocabulary, including “tourism industry,” “local culture,” “GDP,” “tourist places,” and “unemployed people.” These terms help communicate the general subject, but vocabulary is repetitive and often imprecise, which can make the intended meaning difficult to follow. For instance, “the demage tourism is causes the local culture” does not clearly express the effect you mean, and “collebrate with others countries people” is not an appropriate phrase for interaction between visitors and residents. Spelling errors such as “cruical,” “exapmle,” and “indusry” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise range for discussing impacts, such as cultural preservation, environmental pressure, local communities, and economic benefits.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some longer sentences using “when,” “because,” and “that,” as in “when the people not come in your country for tourism they will demage the local culture.” This shows an effort to connect clauses, but sentence structures are very limited and errors are frequent enough to obscure relationships between ideas. Subject–verb agreement is often incorrect (“the country have,” “Turkey have”), and verb forms and auxiliaries are frequently missing or misused (“they no grow faster,” “they will gave”). Articles and plural forms also need attention, as in “a great tourist place” and “others countries people.” Practise accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with controlled clauses, checking agreement, tense, and articles.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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