Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-30
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
It is often argued by some people that travelling is rapid growth in the fanincial system around the world. Although some people might disagree with this notion, but I completely agree with this statement.Not only because the increase the income of the local people, improve the economy of the country, but also because of job opportunies.There are multiple benefits of this topic.
Firstly, the tourism is important for improve the income of local peoiple. As when travelers visit different place and buying different things and also spend money on that things.As the result they can earn money and also improve their living standard. Take an example of China, in the year 2018, the survay conducted in China, and the world 60% tourism came in this country and the chinese people also happy because their shopes are working properaly. Thus, the travelers are important for improve the income of local people.
Secondly, the tourism is also important for improve the economy of the country.As the travelers came our country the economy is also increase because it attracts foriegn visitors and brings money into the country as the result government can invest more money in public facilities.For instance in Japan, the world biggest visitors came in this country and it is also benefit for japanies government also increase the economy of the country. Hence it is also beneficial foe country.
Finally, the tourism also increase the value of job opportunies because there are more visitors came in our country people can work in the hostel, resturants, and travel agencies.
To sum up, I believe that tourism is very beneficial for every sector. Not only because of increase the income of local people, improve the economy of country and also benefical for job opportunies.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0
The response gives a clear general view that tourism is beneficial, and it supports this with points about local income, the national economy and employment. However, it does not answer the central question: whether you agree or disagree that tourism’s damage to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. The essay discusses tourism’s advantages only, without addressing either type of harm or explaining how these effects should influence your position. The examples about China and Japan are also broad and do not clearly demonstrate the claims made. To address the task more fully, state your position on the damage described and develop relevant reasons and examples about both the benefits and the cultural or environmental costs.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay has a recognisable structure: an introduction, three body paragraphs signalled by “Firstly,” “Secondly,” and “Finally,” and a concluding summary. This makes the main points easy to identify. However, progression is limited because each paragraph repeats the claim that tourism is beneficial, and the conclusion largely restates the introduction rather than drawing together a developed argument. Some links are mechanical or unclear, such as repeated “As” clauses and “As the result.” Improve cohesion by making each paragraph advance a distinct part of your answer, using clear cause-and-effect links, and ensuring examples connect directly to the point they support. A paragraph addressing the harms in the question would also create a more complete progression.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use a basic range of topic-related vocabulary, including “income,” “economy,” “public facilities,” “visitors,” and “travel agencies,” so the general subject is understandable. However, vocabulary is repetitive, particularly “important,” “beneficial,” “increase,” and “improve,” and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, such as “tourism is rapid growth in the financial system” and “increase the value of job opportunities.” Spelling errors, including “opportunies,” “survay,” and “resturants,” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise range for discussing the task, including terms for cultural and environmental impacts, and check spelling and natural word combinations. This will help express ideas more clearly and avoid relying on repeated general words.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response attempts some longer structures, including “Although some people might disagree with this notion” and cause-and-effect explanations, but control is inconsistent. Many sentences contain errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and verb forms. For example, “Although some people might disagree …, but I completely agree” combines two contrasting structures, while “the economy is also increase” has an incorrect verb form. Punctuation and spacing are also unreliable, as in “statement.Not only” and several run-on sentences. These errors sometimes make relationships between ideas difficult to follow. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses; check subject–verb agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence boundaries during revision.
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