Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the perceived danger and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Perceived and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime: by crime type

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The pie charts compare the online sales of four retail sectors (travel, film/music, books and clothes) in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

Overall, In the first year, the travel was largest retail sectors among the four categories. The travel made up the largest share to online sales. Clothes made up slightly greater than film/music. The book has the smallest share in online sales. For the second year, the film/music represented the largest proportion of online sales. Where travel fell to the second place. Books registered a small increase and rise up clothes. Clothes has the smallest share in their sales.

In 2003, the travel was the largest retail sector, accounting for 36% of online sales. The clothes and film/music had similar proportion, at 24% and 21% respectively. In 2003, books had the smallest share in online sales, at about 19%.

In 2013, film/music was the largest retail sector, at about 33%. The share of travel decreases to around 29%. Books also increase in 2013 and reached 22%. Clothes had the smallest share in 2013, at about 16%.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 2.0

The student has failed to address the task prompt. The instructions ask for a summary of a graph regarding the 'perceived danger and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime', yet the student has written a report about 'online sales of four retail sectors'. This is a major task failure. While the student does attempt to report data and make comparisons, the content is entirely irrelevant to the provided image. Consequently, the response cannot be assessed as a successful completion of the task. The information provided is a complete mismatch with the source material.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. There is a clear attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'In the first year', and 'In 2013'. However, the logical progression is undermined by the fact that the content is completely unrelated to the prompt. While the structure itself is functional and follows the standard format for an IELTS Academic Task 1 report, the lack of relevance to the actual data provided makes the overall coherence ineffective.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate for describing trends and proportions, such as 'accounted for', 'proportion', 'registered', and 'largest share'. However, there are several errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'rise up clothes' and 'the travel was largest retail sectors'. The range is sufficient to convey the intended meaning of the (incorrect) data, but the lack of precision and the repetitive nature of the reporting limit the score. The vocabulary is generally simple and lacks the sophistication required for higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the travel', 'the book') and verb tenses/subject-verb agreement ('the travel was largest retail sectors', 'Clothes has the smallest share'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are persistent throughout the text. The student demonstrates a basic ability to construct sentences, but the control over grammar is inconsistent, and the errors are frequent enough to detract from the overall quality of the writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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