Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the perceived danger and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Perceived and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime: by crime type

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The bar chart illustrate information about the percentage of being a victim of a crime .

Overall ، It is clear from the graph that the perceived 2009/10 are extremely high in all types of crime and this may be related to the lack of security measures. In addition .We can see that the perceived 2010/11 get the second place since it also get high percentage nearly 17 % of car crime and 13% of burglary and 14% of violent crime.

According to what is shown. The actual get extremely low percentage at both of 2009/10 and 2010/11 even though there is divergent in the percentage for instance .The car crime get the highest record in the both types by almost 5% after that we have the violent crime with nearly 4% and for the lowest one in the whole bar graph we get the burglar with about 3% .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response attempts to summarise the data provided in the bar chart, but it falls short in terms of accuracy and feature selection. The student misinterprets the categories, referring to the years 2009/10 and 2010/11 as the perceived categories, whereas the graph clearly compares perceived danger versus actual likelihood across different crime types. Furthermore, the data points reported, such as "nearly 17 % of car crime", do not accurately reflect the figures on the chart. While the main features like car crime and violent crime are mentioned, the overall misunderstandings and inaccurate data reporting prevent the response from fully addressing the task requirements. Consequently, the score for task achievement reflects a limited attempt to extract and report the correct information.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response shows severe organisational flaws. The text is split into very short paragraphs, and the use of punctuation is erratic and non-standard, featuring incorrect characters like arabic commas and misplaced full stops in phrases like 'In addition .We can see' and 'for instance .The car crime'. Paragraphing is not used effectively to structure the comparison of information. Cohesive devices are either misused or absent, creating a disjointed progression of ideas. References between sentences are often unclear, making the overall arrangement difficult to follow. The flow of information lacks logical sequencing, which significantly impacts the readability and coherence of the summary.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The lexical range is very basic and repetitive throughout the text. The student frequently uses phrases like 'extremely high', 'get the second place', and 'low percentage'. There are significant vocabulary errors, such as misusing 'perceived' as a noun instead of an adjective, and referring to the category of burglary as 'the burglar'. Words related to data reporting, such as 'record' and 'types', are used inaccurately. These lexical limitations and errors constrain the precision of the response and cause some difficulty for the reader in understanding the intended comparisons.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammatical range is extremely limited, relying heavily on simple sentence structures that are frequently marred by basic errors. There are numerous punctuation and capitalization mistakes, including stray periods, commas in unusual places, and starting sentences with lowercase letters in places. Subject-verb agreement and tense usage are also problematic, as seen in 'The bar chart illustrate', 'it also get high percentage', and 'there is divergent'. Simple errors occur in almost every sentence, significantly impairing grammatical accuracy and demonstrating very weak control over sentence construction.

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