Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the perceived danger and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Perceived and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime: by crime type

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given graph illustrates the information about four types victim of crime involved in different condition such as perceived danger and actual likelihood. Overall, it can be seen that, perceived and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime have highest proportion of crime in car crime perceived 2009/10, whereas the lowest deta was shown in burglary actual 2009/10. To start with,the highest ceime victim present in car crime,perceived 2009/10 (around 21%) as well as perceived 2010/11 (around 17%), whereas actual 2009/10 and actual 2010/11 both are same proportion of victim in car crime (approximately 4%). Secondly, in burglary and violent crime, the ratio of victim in perceived 2009/10 (around 15%)and perceived 2010/11(13% respectively) was same, but the striking think was the lowest proportion of acutual 2009/10, it can be seen in burglary around 2% and the actual 2010/11 only 3%, however, in violent crime, the both victim is 4% respectively.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The student attempts to summarise the graph by mentioning car crime, burglary, and violent crime alongside categories like perceived danger and actual likelihood. However, the response contains several inaccuracies and fails to provide a comprehensive overview of all main features. For example, the student states that car crime had the 'highest proportion of crime in car crime perceived 2009/10' and mentions percentages that are somewhat imprecise. Furthermore, some data points are misread or awkwardly expressed, such as claiming 'actual 2009/10 and actual 2010/11 both are same proportion'. The overview is weak, consisting of a single convoluted sentence. This places the response at Band 5 for Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5

The text is divided into an introduction and body paragraphs, showing an attempt at organisation. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow due to poor linking and tangled sentence structures. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or repetitively, such as 'To start with' and 'Secondly', but the internal cohesion within sentences often breaks down. Referencing is frequently unclear, as seen in phrases like 'the both victim is 4% respectively'. Paragraphing is minimally attempted, but the lack of clear logical flow and mechanical transitions means the response struggles to achieve a clear, coherent arrangement throughout.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

The student uses a very limited and repetitive range of vocabulary, relying heavily on basic terms like 'crime', 'victim', 'proportion', and 'perceived'. There are noticeable word choice and collocation errors throughout the response, such as 'four types victim of crime involved in different condition' and 'lowest deta' (data). The attempt to use less common vocabulary results in awkward phrasing like 'striking think' (thing) and 'acutual'. While the meaning can sometimes be guessed, the lexical limitations and spelling errors cause noticeable difficulty for the reader.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5

The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but these attempts are frequently faulty and fraught with grammatical errors. There are significant issues with subject-verb agreement, such as 'perceived and actual likelihood... have highest proportion' and 'the both victim is 4%'. Punctuation and article use are erratic, and run-on sentences with poor comma splices are common. Frequent errors in basic grammar and sentence construction hinder readability and mean that error-free sentences are very rare.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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