Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below shows the perceived danger and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Perceived and actual likelihood of being a victim of crime: by crime type

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The given bar graph illustrate the victim of crime percentages of people. that contain different type of crime in three years the one crime and victim that are mostly chances

firstly. I disscus about the buglary crime in the 2009 to 10 the percentage reach at perceived 15 to actual 2 percent the percentage are fluctuate and secondly the car time crime percentage is touch to peak in noticed that is twenty percent and seventy percent in viewed in 2010 and next year and actual crime percentage is basically reach at 4percent crime that is same on two years. In the last iI lke describe the violent crime that consider in 2009 to 2010 crime rate is 15 percent and consider the crime rate is 14 percent inthe 2010 and 2011 on the other hand the actual percentage is same in both years that reach at 4 percent of crime rate

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the three crime categories and attempts to compare perceived with actual figures across the two periods, so it is relevant to the chart. However, it gives no clear overview of the main pattern, such as perceived risk being much higher than actual victimisation in every category. Several figures are inaccurate or unclear: car crime is described as “twenty percent and seventy percent,” although the perceived values are about 21% and 17%; violent crime’s actual figures are reported as the same, despite rising from about 3% to 3.5%. Burglary’s perceived figures are also not compared across both years. The limited, partly misreported coverage means the key features are only minimally conveyed. A concise overview and accurate comparisons would strengthen the report.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to organise the response by crime type, using signals such as “firstly,” “secondly” and “In the last.” This gives the reader some indication of the intended sequence. However, the ideas are not arranged into clear paragraphs, and the opening sentence is difficult to follow. Connections between figures are often unclear: for example, “twenty percent and seventy percent in viewed in 2010 and next year” does not make the comparison understandable. The response also moves between perceived and actual data without consistently signalling which series is being discussed. Use a clear introduction and overview, then group comparisons logically, with accurate linking phrases and references.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some task-related vocabulary, including “percentage,” “perceived,” “actual,” “crime rate” and “peak,” showing an attempt to describe chart data. However, the range is basic and several word choices or spellings make the meaning difficult to recover. Phrases such as “victim of crime percentages of people,” “car time crime” and “percentage are fluctuate” are not natural or precise descriptions. “Touch to peak” is also an awkward collocation, while repeated use of “crime percentage” limits variety. Aim for standard chart language such as “the proportion who perceived a risk,” “the actual rate,” “rose slightly” and “was highest.” Check spelling and choose terms that clearly distinguish perceived risk from actual victimisation.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts to form longer sentences and use time references, but grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes obscure the intended comparisons. For example, “The given bar graph illustrate” has subject–verb disagreement, and “that contain different type of crime” lacks a clear grammatical connection to the opening clause. Verb forms and sentence boundaries are also problematic in “the percentage are fluctuate” and the long sentence beginning “secondly the car time crime percentage.” Capitalisation and punctuation are inconsistent, making several statements run together. Practise writing short, complete sentences first, with a clear subject and verb, then add comparisons using controlled clauses such as “Perceived risk fell, while the actual rate remained stable.”

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.