Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-11-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

In the past woman position were lowed in the world however in the modern era ladies were concider powerful .today , the power of girls were strong while in past woman consider not better then the man . i agruee that woman were impare for nation further more they cannot beat the man power or strength.

in the begining , few years later different states dont consider woman impaire they cinsider they make only for domastic work and take of babies , therefore, ladies stayed at home and look after their fimilyies .on the site of example , a survay conducted by bbc they published in india and pakistan a large number of women wast their time and burden our family and nation .hence , their work were of home baseled.

In the other world , in the modern world the nation throught were changed . women and man they were equal for any rights and profession even in the offices the strength of woman were high then the men therefore , they enjoyed liberty in every field of life then the men . furthermore , gender does not matter in currently states .for instance , a very famour artical in the newspapes (the news) a large number of woman in the modern society were successful and independant day by day .yet, girls power were leads the special character in nations.

To conclude, althrough, old peple throght right howere the modern peple were appricates . i strongly believe that the woman in every nation leads special role like they worked in resturent, hospitals , schools , engineries

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address the topic and give a position, especially in the opening claim that women’s status has changed and in the conclusion that women play important roles. However, the response does not clearly answer the central question of whether societies have achieved gender equality: it shifts between saying women and men have equal rights and professions and claiming women cannot match men’s strength. These ideas are not reconciled, and the reasons are only briefly stated. The examples about a BBC survey and a newspaper article are vague and do not explain what evidence they provide about equality. To strengthen the response, state clearly whether you agree or disagree, then develop two relevant reasons with specific, explained examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and phrases such as “furthermore,” “for instance” and “to conclude” show an attempt to guide the reader. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because the main point changes within paragraphs: the second paragraph describes women as confined to domestic work, while the next claims equality has been achieved without explaining the contrast. Some linking expressions are repetitive or do not clearly show the relationship between ideas, and references such as “they” are sometimes unclear. Organise each body paragraph around one reason, connect its example directly to that reason, and use transitions that accurately signal contrast or addition.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “gender,” “profession,” “liberty,” “independent” and “nation,” and you try to use more formal terms such as “survey” and “article.” However, the range is basic and repetitive, and frequent spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to understand, for example “impaire,” “domastic,” “fimilyies” and “throught.” Several combinations are also unnatural, such as “woman position,” “burden our family and nation” and “girls power were leads.” Build a reliable set of topic vocabulary and check spelling and collocations. Prefer precise phrases such as “women’s social position,” “unpaid domestic work” and “women’s participation in the workforce.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including clauses joined with “therefore” and “while,” but control is limited and errors are frequent enough to obscure meaning. Examples include “the power of girls were strong,” where subject–verb agreement is incorrect, and “they make only for domestic work,” where the verb form and sentence structure are faulty. Tense shifts also occur, as in “women and man they were equal” followed by “they enjoyed liberty,” without a clear time frame. Articles, plurals and punctuation are also inconsistent. Practise building accurate basic sentences first, then add subordinate clauses. Check that each sentence has a clear subject and verb, and keep tense consistent when describing past and present conditions.

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