Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-11-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many societies, social status of women has increased significantly over the past half century. However, those societies cannot declare that gender equality was achieved due to the difference between legal equality and de facto equality.

Admittedly, in some nations, women have successfully won a variety of rights, including rights to vote. Take Taiwan for example. At 2020, Tsai-Ing-Wen won the position of president, reaching a milestone of the first ever female president. Furthermore, the stereotype of how a women should be like has almost been eliminated in several countries including Taiwan.

However, improvement in rights doesn't mean achievement in equality. Problems such as gender pay gap still remains in most countries. A study shows that there is a 20 percent pay gap between genders in Japan, meaning males will have 20 percent higher wages than females. Another problem is the unpaid domestic housework. Mothers in countless nations still have to take care of their children or do the housework most of the time while fathers going out working.

At some extreme cases, women in specific society didn't even have the basic rights of a human. Take India for example, a terrible news reported that a female from America was raped and murdered when she is traveling to India alone.

In conclusion, improvement does not mean achievement, in many countries such as India and Japan, gender inequality still remains. Furhtermore, legal equality does not mean de facto equality, the problem of unpaid domestic housework proved that beyond legal rights, women still have to fought for different rights.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you agree that progress has not yet produced gender equality, and the distinction between “legal equality and de facto equality” gives the response a relevant central idea. You support this with examples of women’s political representation, the pay gap in Japan, and unequal domestic responsibilities. However, these points are not developed equally. The Taiwan example shows progress, but the claim that stereotypes have “almost been eliminated” is broad and needs qualification or evidence. The report about a traveller in India is also not clearly connected to wider gender equality, and its relevance would be stronger if you explained the broader issue it illustrates. Develop each example and link it explicitly to your position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall arrangement: an introduction states your position, the body moves from progress to continuing inequalities, and the conclusion restates the main argument. Paragraphing helps distinguish these stages, while transitions such as “Admittedly,” “However,” and “In conclusion” make the direction easy to follow. At times, though, the progression feels mechanical because several points are introduced without being fully connected or explained. For example, the shift from domestic work to the incident in India is abrupt, and the relationship between that incident and the argument about equality is not made explicit. Some references, such as “those societies” and “different rights,” are also broad. Build clearer links between examples and the paragraph’s main claim.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “gender equality,” “stereotype,” “gender pay gap,” and “unpaid domestic housework.” The distinction between “legal equality” and “de facto equality” is particularly useful for expressing your argument. There are also some inaccurate or unnatural choices that make the writing less precise, such as “won the position of president,” “At 2020,” and “a terrible news.” “Social status” does not quite capture the broader changes in women’s rights and opportunities described in the task. Spelling errors such as “Furhtermore” also reduce accuracy. Aim for more natural collocations and precise terms, and check spelling carefully; this will make your ideas sound more fluent and controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including the contrast in “However, improvement in rights doesn't mean achievement in equality” and the longer sentence about mothers’ domestic responsibilities. Most of the meaning remains clear, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “how a women should be like” has an article and plural-form problem, while “Problems … still remains” has subject–verb disagreement. In “while fathers going out working,” the verb structure is incomplete, and “women still have to fought” uses the wrong verb form after “have to.” There are also tense and article problems in the India example. Review agreement, verb patterns, and articles, then proofread each sentence for a complete and consistent structure.

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