Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-11-12

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

There is growing debate that in recent years, women position has completely differed in several societies. As today women is more aware about her goals, achievements rather than previous one. It would be misguided that Societies did not accept gender equality. In this essay, I will share my opinion with examples.

Initially, Our society bestowed women with significant number of opportunities in every field of life. From early age to old age, women has different facilities. Take , for instance, now women can get education easily and have separate educational institutes. Furthermore, it should be noted that women are now educating people to understand their position however, society has different educated people which showed some respect. As we can see that different women in our society are jobholders. so it is worth noticing that this society has accepted gender equality.

Secondly, I firmly believe that society has major role in establishment of women position. If society did not agree, then women could not fulfill and achieved their goals as well as men. Nowadays, women are working jobs in same sector as men. This can be seen clearly in banking , hospitals, companies and factories. Now women has right to give her opinion in front of anyone.

Having said that women has achieved her goals by just own strength. I believe on this point but our society has also lifted up in achieving their goals as they provide more ways to grow.

To conclude, it appears to me that society has major role in women development and society accepts gender equality so women rises herself.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You give a recognisable position: you argue that society has helped women progress and that gender equality has been accepted. The examples of education, employment and women expressing opinions are relevant to the topic. However, the prompt asks whether societies can claim to have achieved equality, and your response largely asserts that they have, without examining whether important inequalities remain or clarifying what equality means. Several points are repeated rather than developed—for example, that society provides opportunities and supports women’s goals. Add specific evidence or examples and address possible limits, such as unequal pay or representation, so your position responds more fully to the central claim.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and signposts such as “Initially,” “Secondly” and “To conclude” make the basic structure visible. The ideas are generally grouped by topic, with education and employment discussed before the conclusion. However, progression is limited: the second paragraph repeats the claim that society enables women to achieve their goals, and the final body paragraph begins “Having said that” without clearly contrasting or extending the previous point. Some links are mechanical, while references such as “this society” are not specific. Organise each paragraph around a distinct reason, then use clearer links to show how each example supports your position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “gender equality,” “opportunities,” “educational institutes,” “jobholders” and “establishment.” This gives the response enough relevant language to communicate its general argument. However, the range is limited and several choices or combinations sound unnatural, such as “women position,” “women are working jobs,” “society has lifted up” and “women rises herself.” Repetition of “society,” “women” and “goals” also reduces flexibility. Aim to learn common collocations for this topic and use more precise terms, such as “women’s status,” “enter the workforce,” and “advance their careers.” This would make your ideas clearer and more natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple statements and longer sentences with clauses, for example, “If society did not agree, then women could not fulfill and achieved their goals.” This shows an effort to express cause and condition, but the longer structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. Examples include “women has” and “women is,” where subject–verb agreement is incorrect, and “could not fulfill and achieved,” where the verb forms do not match. Capitalisation and punctuation are also inconsistent, as in “Our society” and “Take , for instance.” Practise accurate agreement and parallel verb forms, then check each sentence for punctuation and sentence boundaries.

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