Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is often argued that womens has organise and broadened the societies over the past 50 years, however modern societies cannot ready to claim about achieved gender equality. I completely disagree with this argument as educated womens cannot make betterment in his own life but build a better society as well.

On the one hand, peoples are less awaire about the abilities of womens, therefore they try to keep them uneducated, they dont even allow to attend their majour academic classes. For instance in the past womens were not allowed to receive proper education because our ancestors believed that womens were only responsible to household duties and raising child. As a rezult womens remains less educated, however most of the poor families cannot afford education of their child, furthermore parents may priorities boys education over girls.

On the other hand, nowadays the trend has been changed women are equaly prioritise to men, they receive equal laws and education, they can work in various fields including medicine, engineering and information technology. Furthermore, women have become more financialy independent because they can earn their own money and make important decisions about their lives. For example many womens are working as company directors, government officials and university professors. athae development clerly demonstrate that womens social status and opportunities have changed accordingly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address the topic and give a clear position in the introduction: “I completely disagree.” The two body paragraphs also offer relevant points about past barriers to women’s education and women’s current participation in professional life. However, the argument does not fully answer the question: the prompt asks whether societies have achieved gender equality, while your response mainly describes progress and does not explain clearly why that progress does or does not amount to equality. The opening claim is also difficult to interpret, and the examples are mostly general rather than developed. The response is 32 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to explain your reasoning. Clarify your position in relation to equality and support it with specific examples and explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

Your response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs beginning with “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a progression from historical barriers to present-day opportunities. Linking expressions such as “For instance” and “Furthermore” help signal examples and additions. However, the contrast between the paragraphs is not fully connected to your stated disagreement, so the overall line of argument is difficult to follow. Some sentences also combine several points, particularly the first body paragraph, where education, household duties, and family finances appear without clear development. Add a concluding paragraph that restates your position and synthesises the discussion, and use clearer links to show how each example supports your answer.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “gender equality,” “financially independent,” “government officials,” and “university professors,” which helps communicate the subject. There is some variety in how you describe education and employment. However, frequent spelling errors and inaccurate word forms or collocations make parts of the response difficult to understand, as in “womens has organise,” “less awaire,” and “equally prioritise to men.” Some expressions are also imprecise, such as “claim about achieved gender equality.” These issues fit a limited but minimally adequate range: the reader can identify the main topic, but errors sometimes interrupt meaning. Check spelling and word forms carefully, and learn natural phrases such as “achieve gender equality” and “have equal opportunities.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses linked with “because,” “therefore,” and “however.” This shows an effort to express cause and contrast, but control is inconsistent, and many sentences contain errors that make the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “womens has organise and broadened” has problems with subject–verb agreement and verb form, while “they receive equal laws and education” does not form a clear grammatical relationship. There are also errors in articles, plurals, and sentence boundaries, such as the run-on transition in “nowadays the trend has been changed women are…”. Practise building accurate subject–verb sentences first, then add one subordinate clause at a time and check punctuation.

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