Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-07-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The controversy surrounding the change in position of women in many societies over the past 50 years which has always been a topic of discussion but now reached a fever pitch in society. While there are certainly reasons that these societies cannot claim to have a gender equality. I also believe that gender equality has never got equal rights.

Analyzing the statement, the position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 5 decades. But these societies cannot claim to have a gander equality. First and foremost, women have proper equal rights in every society in every age wherever the society is located. Another striking factor is that, women plays a important role in every society in every field. Women are also a part of a our society. But in some societies women are scene as a curse. People in poor societies sell out there daughters, there sisters and there wife for some money.

Probing ahead, one of the most underlying reasons why these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality is that the women who work themselves are scene in another way especially in poor societies. I believe that women have equal rights and have a proper and separate place to work. For instance, in poor societies young women are rapped and never get proper pay for which they work full month and got rapped. To stop this kind of shit separate place for work is necessary.

In conclusion, one can conclude that the benefits of gender equality play a very important role in every society to make it strong and powerful. Gender equality are indeed too dire to ignore.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt but lacks a clear, consistent position. While you acknowledge that gender equality has not been achieved, your arguments are often contradictory or unclear, such as stating 'I also believe that gender equality has never got equal rights.' The ideas are under-developed and rely on generalizations rather than logical progression. The essay lacks a cohesive argument, and the conclusion does not effectively summarize the main points or reinforce your stance. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-supported idea that directly answers the 'to what extent' aspect of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical flow is weak. Transitions are often mechanical or misused, such as 'Probing ahead,' which does not fit the context. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the relationship between ideas is frequently disjointed. For example, the shift from discussing women's roles to the issue of violence in 'poor societies' lacks a smooth transition. To improve, use a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., 'furthermore,' 'consequently,' 'in contrast') to link sentences and ideas more naturally, and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that guides the reader.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is quite limited and repetitive. There are several instances of word-choice errors and inappropriate register, such as using 'shit' to describe a serious social issue, which is not suitable for an academic essay. Additionally, there are frequent spelling errors like 'gander' instead of 'gender', 'scene' instead of 'seen', and 'rapped' instead of 'raped'. These errors occasionally impede communication. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise, academic vocabulary and ensure you are using words in their correct context and spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that often affect the clarity of your writing. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'women plays a important role'), sentence fragments, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'the benefits of gender equality play a very important role... are indeed too dire to ignore'). The range of sentence structures is limited, and the errors are frequent enough to cause some difficulty for the reader. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, subject-verb agreement, and the correct use of articles and prepositions before attempting more complex structures.

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