Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In modern world, women empowerment play a crucial role. The ranking of women has changed a great deal in many communities over the past 50 years. But these societies still not acquire the gender equality. I believe that the position of women has changed but still not society acknowledge as for the gender equality.
Firstly, women play essential role in different workstations. Nowadays, in every field women participate equally and they perform really well. Young girls also have started their online businesses, they offer jobs to the people who are still unemployed. Its a great efforts to develop the country. For instance, in Pakistan a young girl, her name was Areeba she was content creator and she bought a car it was a great achievement. Once in a time, when women do not do jobs or study, but today woman do any thing for their family and to serve the country. In addition, recently i heard about a girl who cleared the CSS exam and posted as a Assistant Commissioner.
Secondly, society has really need to change the mind about the gender equality. Still in some towns there are some workplaces where they do gender discrimination whether they are in schools, university or in job. So, it should eradicate this system completely then women can perform more better way. Furthermore, families, friends should also encourage them to work or study so they can more easily do what they want in their lives.
To conclude, position of women may be changed in society but the discrimination of gender is still present in the community. To grow better version, i firm believe that women should have equal rights to work at any place in future.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by acknowledging the progress in women's status while arguing that gender equality remains elusive. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. The example of 'Areeba' is a bit anecdotal and lacks the analytical depth required for a high-band response. While the essay covers both aspects of the prompt, the arguments regarding why equality has not been achieved could be more sophisticated. The conclusion is brief and reiterates the main point without adding significant synthesis. To improve, focus on providing more academic evidence or broader societal analysis rather than personal anecdotes.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the progression of ideas. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Firstly,' 'In addition,' and 'To conclude,' though some transitions feel a bit mechanical or repetitive. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the sentence 'Once in a time, when women do not do jobs or study,' which lacks a logical connection to the preceding text. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, providing a coherent overall structure despite some minor lapses in flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range expected at higher bands. There are several instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'ranking of women' instead of 'status of women' and 'society has really need to change the mind' instead of 'society needs to change its mindset.' Some word choices are repetitive, and there is limited use of less common lexical items. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of sophisticated collocations and precise terminology limits the score in this criterion.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Examples include 'these societies still not acquire the gender equality' (missing auxiliary verb), 'woman do any thing' (subject-verb agreement), and 'it should eradicate this system' (incorrect voice). Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with comma usage. While the errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the main points, they are frequent enough to suggest a lack of control over more complex grammatical forms.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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