Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-08-12
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Nowadays, many governments has taken steps to develop women empowerment in many cities . The position of women has changed compared to past times but the societies not claiming in gender equality. this essay will discuss both the views.
On the one hand , women has taken position in many fields as officers as well as becoming entrepreneurs by their great knowledge and experience . talking about past over 50 years women has doing only households works and taking care of children . nowadays they had made a relentlessness development in achieving male works and positions like army captain , cab- driver as well as prime minister position .
furthermore , they have given more respect and love rather than past years .
on the other hand , i agree this point that society not claiming that they achieved gender quality because there are many things or work that women can do . firstly, a cleaning a privilege tunnel. where man sacrifices all respect , health and energy to clean that tunnel comparing to women they do not have that much potiential to do they always ignore this type of things that come. furthermore taking other example like making new inventions they contributed zero inventions till past years .
to conclude there is no doubt that women will also overcome this things in coming years . and government should make some programs for society development that they can make gender equality in the society by improving society thoughts about women as well as respect also.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses the prompt but suffers from significant issues in task development and logical consistency. While you acknowledge the change in women's status, your argument regarding gender equality is problematic. The claim that women contribute 'zero inventions' and lack the 'potential' for certain types of labor is a sweeping generalization that lacks factual support and undermines the coherence of your position. Furthermore, the essay fails to clearly state a position in the introduction, merely stating that it will 'discuss both the views,' which is not appropriate for an 'extent' question. To improve, ensure your arguments are balanced, objective, and supported by logical reasoning rather than biased assertions.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the flow of ideas is frequently interrupted by awkward transitions and unclear referencing. While you use basic cohesive devices like 'on the one hand' and 'furthermore,' they are often used to link unrelated or poorly developed points. The paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs is weak, making it difficult for the reader to follow your argument. To improve, focus on using cohesive devices to link sentences logically and ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that directly supports your overall thesis.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
Your vocabulary is limited and often imprecise. There are several instances of incorrect word choice, such as 'relentlessness development' instead of 'relentless development' or 'cleaning a privilege tunnel,' which is unclear. You rely on basic vocabulary and struggle to express complex ideas accurately. There are also issues with word forms, such as 'women empowerment' instead of 'women's empowerment.' To reach a higher band, you need to expand your range of vocabulary and focus on using words in their correct collocations and contexts. Avoid using informal or vague language.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. Subject-verb agreement is a recurring issue, such as 'many governments has taken' and 'women has doing.' Punctuation is also inconsistent, with spaces placed before commas and periods. The sentence structures are mostly simple, and attempts at complex sentences are often marred by errors in syntax. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement, correct verb tenses, and standard punctuation rules. Proofreading your work for these fundamental errors will significantly improve the clarity and quality of your writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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