Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Women experienced a major change in their roles in different societies over the last half century, but still fail to achieve gender equality. I totally agree with this statements that women are not being equally treated as men.

To begin with, women empowernment have been observed over the last fifty years accross different fields such as businesses industries, medical sectors, and eduation. For instance, girls were refused to continue their educaiton after middle or marticulation but now a signficant change can be seen; girls now completeing their master and PHDs in same cases. In addition, it was believed that women are not able to work to tech companies but now women are not just working in big tech companies but performing better.

On the other hand, eventhough women have played a major role in uplift different sectors yet their are not being treated equally as men in different sector and society. Women are facing descrimination in workspace; they are supposed to manage their household responsibilities.

Futhermore, not only there are less oportunities for seniors mangement for women but also only few women get promotions in their companies.

Women are being paid less for the identicial work that men do because of gender inequality.

In conclusion, women are also essential part of our society and they are talented, have proved themselves by amazing performance in their realvant department and aslo contributing significant role in society, and I therefore beleive that they should be given equal respect , opportunites in every sectors without any gender biasness. If women meet the standard criteria of success then they should be promoted.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt, clearly stating a position of agreement. The ideas are relevant, covering both the progress made and the remaining challenges such as the wage gap and workplace discrimination. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For example, while you mention the 'wage gap' and 'senior management' issues, these points are stated rather than fully explored with specific examples or deeper analysis. To reach a higher band, ensure that each supporting point is expanded with more detailed reasoning or illustrative evidence to provide a more comprehensive argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a distinct focus. You use basic cohesive devices such as 'To begin with', 'In addition', 'On the other hand', and 'Furthermore' to signal transitions between ideas. While the progression is generally clear, some of the linking is a bit mechanical. Additionally, there are minor issues with referencing and sentence-level cohesion, such as the phrase 'their are not being treated', where the pronoun usage is incorrect. Improving the variety of cohesive devices and ensuring more fluid transitions between sentences would enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You attempt to use some topic-specific vocabulary like 'empowerment', 'discrimination', and 'gender biasness'. However, there are several spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'empowernment', 'accross', 'eduation', 'marticulation', 'signficant', 'completeing', 'eventhough', 'relevant', and 'aslo'. These errors are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, focus on proofreading for common spelling mistakes and try to incorporate more precise collocations to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'women empowernment have been observed', 'their are not being treated') and article usage. Some sentences are also slightly awkward, such as 'girls were refused to continue their educaiton'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your argument, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall accuracy. Focusing on basic subject-verb agreement and consistent verb tense usage will significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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