Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-08-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is often observed that the level of women has changed in a lots of cities from over five decades. Despites all of these achievements in gender equality remained claimless. I firmly agree with that notion, considering its social and political impact on opposite gender. In this essay i will elaborate the reasons of it with suitable examples before present my opinion.

There are many platforms in where females nailed it such as pilots, space crews, doctors and even in field jobs. To exemplify it, a well known woman sunita williom, who completed the whole journey in space craft known as NASA space station. An wonderful experience of space which she observed and record her name in history. Thereby, many females communities influenced by her and wanted to be in that type of field. Apart from that many women working in field jobs like driving, in construction sights and in copes, which means that women not only do easy works, but they can handle hard work too.

Despite all that achievements many societies still unable to make an equal atmosphere for both genders. There are significant reasons to happened that. One considerable factor would be the older generation. Because of their myths which has been continued from ancient times they used to discrimnate women from past time. To cite an example women not allowed to go outside after a particular time. Its rare in many countries to see females night out like India.

In conclusion, although females doing their best in many areas, still they decrimanated by many peoples just because old myths. It should be ban by authorities Because they are the one who can mitigate that problem for possible extent.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide examples like Sunita Williams and mention field jobs, the analysis of why gender equality remains elusive is quite general. The argument regarding 'old myths' is a good starting point, but it lacks depth. To reach a higher band, ensure that your supporting points are more thoroughly explained and linked directly to the prompt's requirement to discuss the extent of change versus the lack of equality. The introduction is a bit unclear in its phrasing, which slightly impacts the clarity of your position.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate, such as 'Thereby' and 'Apart from that', which do not always connect ideas logically. Referencing is sometimes unclear, for example, 'There are significant reasons to happened that'. The progression of ideas is present but can feel disjointed at times. Improving the variety and accuracy of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would significantly improve the flow and coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward word choices and non-standard collocations, such as 'level of women', 'remained claimless', and 'females night out'. Spelling errors are also frequent, including 'decrimanated', 'peoples', and 'sights' (instead of 'sites'). While your meaning is generally clear, the limited range and recurring errors in word choice and spelling prevent the essay from achieving a higher score in this criterion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and attempts at more complex sentences often contain grammatical errors. There are frequent issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage, and tense consistency, such as 'myths which has been continued' and 'women not allowed to go'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with capitalisation and sentence boundaries. While the errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable throughout the text. Focusing on basic sentence construction and proofreading for common grammatical slips would be beneficial.

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