Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Now a days, women play an essential role in society. The participation of women in numerous fields is clearly seen in recent years. The position of women has altered on a large scale in many societies over the past five decades nevertheless, these societies cannot able of saying that they achieved gender equality. I strongly agree with this statement for several reasons.

In addition, women's involvement is rising day by day. Many women are participating in many work fields such as education, jobs, and even in local businesses. For instance, in some societies womens are doing various jobs in educational institutes. They work as a teacher and make their career more better. Moreover, in some areas womens are running their own local businesses. It assists in order to reduce poverty in public.

Furthermore, despite all of these things in some societies difference in gender equality still exist somewhere. For instance, in few traditional areas womens need to stay at home rather than doing jobs outside. Moreover, alter in gender equality also can be seen in such companies. They paid by less salary as compared to men.

However, some people still consider that gender equality is achieved. They argue that now women are getting equal opportunities as well as men. They believe that women are also participating in such politics and leaderships. Despite all of these things there are not sufficient reasons to claim that gender equality is achieved.

To recapitulate, gender equality plays a crucial role in society whereas, if gender equality may not ne achieved in future it spread bad impacts in society and rasism will be rise on a large scale.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position and providing relevant arguments. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention education and business, the examples are quite general and lack depth. The discussion regarding the 'pay gap' and 'traditional roles' is relevant but could be expanded with more specific analysis to reach a higher band. The conclusion introduces new, slightly confusing ideas like 'racism,' which is not directly related to the topic of gender equality. To improve, ensure that every paragraph directly supports your main thesis with well-explained, focused points.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the argument. You use some cohesive devices such as 'In addition,' 'Moreover,' and 'To recapitulate.' However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly unnatural, such as 'despite all of these things' being repeated twice. The progression of ideas is generally logical, but the transition between the body paragraphs and the conclusion is abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph flows naturally into the next would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but it lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on simple phrasing such as 'make their career more better' (which is also grammatically incorrect) and 'various jobs.' There is some repetition of basic terms like 'society' and 'gender equality.' To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated collocations and topic-specific vocabulary, such as 'socio-economic barriers,' 'professional advancement,' or 'systemic inequality.' Additionally, ensure you use the correct plural forms, as 'womens' is incorrect; the plural is 'women.'

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'cannot able of saying,' 'make their career more better,' 'they paid by less salary,' and 'if gender equality may not ne achieved.' These errors, particularly with verb forms, prepositions, and comparative structures, are noticeable. While the meaning is generally understood, the frequency of these slips prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct usage of comparative adjectives to improve your accuracy.

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