Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Women now have more accessibility and oppurtunities in various fields compared to 50 years ago. Despite this improvement, gender equality is yet to be even. This essay strongly agrees with this statement as I believe that the equality between both genders is not perfect yet.

It is acknowledged that the position of women have seen a great change; way better than how it was in the past. One of the reason of this is the development in allowing women to have equal rights to men in aspects like education or work. It is obviously known that women were not allowed to study or have a job in the past because women were often looked down on. People thought that these fields can only be for men. But this mindset have changed and women are now highly educated and can even be in a lucrative position; this is a big change for women. For instance, in the past, in almost every country across the globe, shared the same view; women should be at home doing housechores and are responsible for looking after the kids. Fortunately now, women are free to do other things as well like working and achieve their desired goals.

Although women's right have been improved, there are still some gaps which prevents it from the idea of equal rights between genders to be completely fair. One of them being the fact that in some countries, women do not have much voice in politics, sometimes even silenced. This means that men are mostly the leaders and they can make powerful decisions. While women can not really have an opinion in politcal choices. For example, in Afghanistan, women's rights are limited and the nation is mainly controlled by men.

In conclusion, even though there is a noticeable change in gender equality, I believe that it not completely equal yet dued to reasons like the voices of women are yet to be heard specifically in politic matters.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses the prompt by acknowledging the progress made in gender equality while arguing that true equality has not yet been achieved. The position is clear throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you provide a relevant example regarding political representation in Afghanistan, the discussion remains quite general. To reach a higher band, you should expand on your arguments with more nuanced analysis or additional examples, perhaps touching on economic disparities like the gender pay gap or social expectations, rather than relying on broad statements. The conclusion effectively restates your position, but ensure that your supporting points are fully explored in the body paragraphs to demonstrate a deeper engagement with the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Although', 'For instance', and 'In conclusion' to link ideas. However, the flow is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions between sentences feel abrupt. For example, the transition between discussing education and the example of household chores could be smoother. Additionally, the referencing is sometimes repetitive. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that guides the reader through your argument more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'lucrative position', 'gender equality', and 'political choices'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'accessibility and oppurtunities' (spelling error) and 'the equality between both genders is not perfect yet' (which is slightly unnatural). There is also some repetition of basic vocabulary like 'past' and 'women'. To improve, try to incorporate more precise academic collocations and synonyms to avoid repetition. Ensure you proofread for spelling errors, as 'oppurtunities' and 'housechores' (housework) are incorrect.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally distract the reader. For instance, subject-verb agreement issues are present, such as 'the position of women have seen' (should be 'has seen') and 'this mindset have changed' (should be 'has changed'). There are also errors with prepositions and articles, such as 'One of the reason of this' (should be 'One of the reasons for this') and 'in politic matters' (should be 'in political matters'). While these errors do not prevent communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focus on subject-verb agreement and consistent tense usage.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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