Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The position of women has changed a great deal in education, work and law in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies can not claim to have gender equality.

In countries like Japan and South Korea, women now make up 50%+ of university graduates and have entered professional jobs. But workplace seniority, long working hours, and traditional family expectations still limit leadership roles. Both rank low on World Economic Forum Gender Gap Index for political and economic participation. And in case of China, there has been massive increase in women in workforce and education since 1970s. But gender gap, ''leftover women'' stigma, and few women in top political positions persist.

In India, now there are more girls in school, politics and there are more women CEOs and astronauts. Laws against dowery and domestic violence exists. But female labor force participation is still under 25% and issues like safety, child marriage and wage gap exists. In Pakistan there are more women in parliament, medicine, media and higher education than 50 years ago. but mobility, inheritance rights and workplace participation are still restricted in many areas.

In countries like UEA, Saudi Arabia and Qatar, we saw massive change in last 20 years. Women are allowed to drive, study in universities and take part in politics. But guardian laws, workforce segregation and social norms still create inequality.

In nutshell, while there has been a massive increase in women's access to education, employment and legal rights over the past 50 years, significant disparities remain in pay, leadership and cultural attitude.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by acknowledging the progress made in women's rights while arguing that gender equality remains elusive. The essay is well-supported with specific examples from various regions, such as Japan, South Korea, China, India, and the Middle East. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat list-like. While the examples are relevant, the essay lacks a deeper analytical synthesis of why these disparities persist, which prevents it from reaching the highest band. The position is clear throughout, and the conclusion effectively summarizes the main argument.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized, with each paragraph focusing on a specific geographical region to illustrate the argument. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive, with many sentences starting with 'But' or 'And'. While the progression of ideas is clear, the transition between the regional examples and the overall argument could be more sophisticated. The use of referencing is generally clear, but the flow between sentences could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to connect the contrasting points more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The vocabulary is adequate for the task and allows for clear communication. You demonstrate a good grasp of topic-specific terminology such as 'workplace seniority', 'labor force participation', and 'guardian laws'. However, there is a lack of more sophisticated, less common lexical items that would elevate the response. Some phrasing is slightly simplistic, and there are minor issues with collocation, such as 'in case of China' instead of 'in the case of China'. To improve, focus on integrating more precise academic collocations and varied synonyms to avoid repetitive sentence structures.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are recurring grammatical errors, particularly with articles (e.g., 'on World Economic Forum' should be 'on the World Economic Forum') and subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'laws... exists' should be 'laws... exist'). Punctuation is generally functional, though some sentence fragments and informal sentence starters detract from the overall academic tone. The range of structures is sufficient, but more consistent control over complex grammatical forms is needed to reach a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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