Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays; women are playing very important role in society and they have achieve very good place over past 50 years. Some people opine that these world cannot want to keep both men and women on equal place. I am partially agree and disagree with this statement and discuss its relevant point in upcoming paragraph.

To commence with; having backward thinking and male ego is the first and foremost reason why i agree that societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality. To explain this; a large number of masses thinks that women should not participate in any outside activities. If women participate; men ego will be hurt. They will think that how a female can do these kind of activities. For an instance; many girls are giving the NEET exam and IAS exam and they are cracking that exam and becoming doctor and many more.

However; there are also some point of disagreement in term of better opportunities is the one main reason of disagreement.To explain this; there are many activities which are for women and females plays a very important role in it. If there are better opportunities ; automatically women will come in front and do a different kind of task. For an example; there are many organisations which helps females a-lot. Ultimately having better deals for women is my point of disagreement .

To recapitulate this, having male ego and backward thinking is main reason why i agree that socities cannot claim to have achieved gender equality; in contrast having better opportunities is my point of disagr

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument, though the development is quite limited. While you state your position clearly in the introduction, the supporting ideas in the body paragraphs are repetitive and lack depth. For instance, the argument regarding 'male ego' is mentioned but not fully explored with sophisticated reasoning. Furthermore, the conclusion is incomplete, which impacts the overall task completion. To improve, ensure that each body paragraph provides a clear, well-developed point supported by specific, relevant examples rather than general statements. The essay also needs a more thorough conclusion that synthesizes the main points discussed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, but the logical flow is hindered by the repetitive nature of the arguments and the incomplete final sentence. You use some cohesive devices like 'To commence with' and 'However', but these are often used mechanically or incorrectly punctuated (e.g., using semicolons instead of commas). The referencing is sometimes unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of your argument. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Additionally, ensure that your sentences are complete and grammatically sound to maintain coherence.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive, relying on basic phrasing such as 'very important role' and 'better opportunities'. There are instances of awkward word choices, such as 'these world cannot want to keep' and 'better deals for women', which do not accurately convey your intended meaning. While the meaning is generally clear, the lack of precision and the limited range of vocabulary prevent a higher score. To improve, try to incorporate more academic collocations and synonyms to express your ideas more precisely. Avoid using informal or vague language and focus on building a more sophisticated academic lexicon.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the essay, including issues with subject-verb agreement ('women... have achieve'), article usage, and sentence structure. Punctuation is a significant issue, particularly the misuse of semicolons instead of commas after introductory phrases. While you attempt some complex structures, they are often marred by errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and correct punctuation. Proofreading for common errors like missing articles or incorrect verb forms will significantly enhance the clarity and accuracy of your writing.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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