Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The issue of whether the reputation of female has alterd in best agreement in different societies more than previous half century. Perhaps, these economy can not accept to have aquired equalitiy in both sexes which is justified remains controversial. I agree to a limited extent, primarily because of its profound social and practical implications.

Initially, i agree with this idea to a large extent because of people who have orthodox mind-set. This result as they apply their dobius rules and regulation into tredition and resiste women to move their further steps towards their great opportunities. A clear example of this is a country side people, who have narrow thinking, do not get enough support and many more hurdles. which consequent their families females. As a result, these female can not complete study, which indirectly affect of countries develpment.

Furthermore, an addition persuasive argument is that illiteracy, financial challenges among elder people can posses this issue. This view point strengthend by the fact that people who can not get proper education and other challenges which may they sufferd from can restrict from these great deal in societies.

Nevertheless, some individuals believe that woment empowerment summit grows rapidly in rach and every corner in coutries. this summit especially working of woment. they encourage female to strengthen their weaknesses along with that develope their inner skills by consultation.

In conclusion, i firmly believe with this idea that in 50 years woment get more opportunities in society but people can not addept this in properway. for a reasons discussed above, as the evidence overwhelmingly supports my position.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to address the prompt regarding whether societies have achieved gender equality despite changes over the past 50 years. The writer takes a clear position, agreeing to a limited extent. However, the development of ideas is significantly hindered by frequent expression issues and underdeveloped supporting arguments. For example, paragraphs introduce general concepts like 'orthodox mind-set' and 'illiteracy' but fail to extend or fully explore them with precise examples. While the overall stance is discernible throughout the essay, the arguments remain somewhat limited and repetitive, which aligns the response closely with Band 5 descriptors where ideas are under-developed and the position becomes slightly obscured by vague phrasing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which provides a basic structural framework. However, the progression of ideas lacks clarity due to weak transitional phrasing and abrupt shifts between sentences. For instance, sentences such as 'This result as they apply their dobius rules and regulation into tredition' fail to connect logically with the surrounding text. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, and referencing is often unclear, such as pronoun usage in 'this view point strengthend by the fact'. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is frequently faulty, placing this response at Band 4.5 to 5.0 in terms of overall logical flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.5

Lexical range is severely restricted and heavily impacted by numerous word-choice errors, incorrect collocations, and spelling mistakes. The student attempts less common vocabulary, but words are frequently misused or distorted, such as 'reputation of female has alterd', 'dobius rules', 'tredition', and 'addept'. Phrases like 'woment empowerment summit' and 'rach and every corner' further demonstrate inadequate control over word formation and collocation. These pervasive errors cause noticeable difficulty for the reader and strain comprehension, which is indicative of a Band 4.5 lexical profile, rounded here to Band 4.5 or 5.0. Basic spelling and morphological errors occur in almost every sentence.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammatical structure of the essay is dominated by frequent, severe errors that impede communication. The response relies primarily on simple and attempted complex sentence forms, but the complex structures are almost invariably faulty. Examples include subject-verb agreement errors ('these economy can not accept'), tense inconsistencies ('alterd', 'sufferd'), and incomplete sentence fragments ('which consequent their families females'). Punctuation and capitalization are also erratic ('Initially, i agree...'). Because errors are frequent, occur across both simple and complex structures, and often cause difficulty for the reader in grasping the intended meaning, the grammar falls squarely into Band 4.0 descriptors.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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