Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-09-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The position of women in the society has changed drastically over past 50 years in many societies, we could see a lot of women leading various roles in the society, even though there has been a lot changes over 5 decades we cannot fully claim to have achieved gender equality due to several factos, I completely agree with this senario.

Firstly, women have fought for their rights and proved that they are no where less than men by participating and working in various roles, leading companies and countries and dominated in the work they do, it was possible because of the courage they had and the passion they possesed in the work they do. But even though there are a lot of women development programs, reservations and a lot of encoragement by goverment and other bodies, few of them still live in a male dominated world where they have no freedom to express their thoughts of feelings, this is most commonly observed in orthodog families in most parts of the world where the elderly people lack basic education.

Not only in that case in most parts of india and other places women are forced to giveup their career and dream once they are married to serve their family and in laws. One of the best example to address this problem is if we took a look at arab counties like Pakistan, Iran, Afghanisthan etc. where women have no freedom to even show their faces in public, where they cannot speak, express their feelings or share their thoughts. They are forced to live this life under the name of religion and are pressuriesed to giveup on their dreams and live a life which doesnot have any freedom.

In conclusion, there are people who still have backward thoughts and believes which are imposed on women, and there are still a lot of women who have no freedom to do what they want.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task by taking a clear and well-supported position that gender equality has not yet been fully achieved despite significant progress over the past 50 years. The writer presents relevant arguments, supporting them with examples such as career sacrifices in India and the severe restrictions faced by women in countries like Afghanistan and Iran. While some points tend to generalise and could be elaborated with greater academic depth, the central thesis is maintained throughout the essay. The ideas are adequately developed and directly answer the prompt requirements.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement and logical progression, though paragraphing is notably weak. The entire body of the essay—spanning multiple distinct arguments regarding domestic expectations, orthodox families, and international examples—is compressed into a single massive paragraph after the introduction. This makes the text difficult to navigate visually and limits cohesion. Cohesive devices are used, but sentences are often chained together with comma splices rather than appropriate conjunctions or full stops (e.g., '...due to several factos, I completely agree with this senario'). More distinct paragraph breaks and refined referencing would elevate this score.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating less common phrases such as 'male dominated world,' 'backward thoughts and believes,' and 'career and dream.' However, there are numerous spelling and word-form errors that detract from the overall precision, including 'factos' instead of factors, 'senario' instead of scenario, 'encoragement' instead of encouragement, 'goverment' instead of government, 'orthodog' instead of orthodox, and 'pressuriesed' instead of pressurised. While these do not completely impede communication, they reflect a lack of control over more advanced spelling and lexical items.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting to link clauses with relative pronouns and subordinating conjunctions. However, grammatical accuracy is severely undermined by recurrent punctuation errors, most notably extensive run-on sentences and comma splices (e.g., '...over past 50 years in many societies, we could see a lot of women leading various roles...'). There are also occasional tense and subject-verb agreement slips, such as 'if we took a look' mixed with present tense references. While the meaning remains mostly clear to the reader, the high frequency of punctuation and structural errors prevents the text from achieving a higher band.

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