Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The position of women has been changed in my many societies over the past 50 year. However, some societies did no claim to have achieved gender equality. I am strongly agree with this statment.

Firstly, nowadays the position of women change in different education field like universities and colleges. In addition, women take participate in different political parties. furthermore, nowadays women are independent to take their decision. Women do different jobs in society, like accounting, officework, becuase the earn money for their self. For instance, in many countries women are becoming doctor and police officer. It has been changed dramatically the position of women in society from the past 50

year. In my opinion it is a positive aspects for country, becuase it reduce the burden of work and pressure.

On the other hand, some societies cannot claim to have gender equality, becuase their salary difference, some company they paid a low salary to women, but for a same work they paid in good figure to men. In addition, in some societies their cultural strickness women cannot do any job. For

instace, in Pakistan mostly the responsibility on the shoulder of men. Women are house wife they takecare of their childrens and husband. In some

politican party cannot give value to women, becuase gender inequality.

In conclusion, the position of women has been changed over the past 50 year dramatically. Women take part in different institute for their education.

In addition, they independent to take decision by their own. However, some socities has still a traditional culture. Government should make equality

between men and women.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by presenting a clear position and discussing both the changes in women's roles and the reasons why full equality has not yet been achieved. Relevant ideas are introduced, such as increased access to education, political participation, and employment, alongside counter-points like the gender wage gap and cultural strictures. However, some of these ideas are under-developed or lack full elaboration. For instance, the mention of political parties and cultural restrictions in Pakistan provides a relevant example, but it remains brief and lacks deeper extension. To reach a higher level, the writer should ensure that every main point is fully supported with expanded explanations or more detailed examples rather than remaining as generalised statements.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance split across paragraphs, using basic transition words like 'Firstly', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical and repetitive, particularly in how sentences are linked. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and paragraphing could be improved to better group related ideas, as some paragraphs shift rapidly between different points without smooth logical progression. To achieve a stronger flow, the writer needs to employ a wider and more natural variety of cohesive devices and ensure that referencing words connect clearly to preceding ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'gender equality', 'dramatically', and 'traditional culture'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and spelling throughout the text. Examples include 'officework', 'becuase', 'statment', 'strickness', 'takecare', 'house wife', and 'politican'. While these lexical errors and spelling slips do not completely impede communication, they reflect a limited and less precise control of word forms and spelling. Expanding the range of vocabulary and ensuring accurate word formation would significantly strengthen this area.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writing displays a mix of simple and some complex sentence forms, but attempts at complex structures are often accompanied by frequent errors. There are notable issues with subject-verb agreement, verb tenses, missing articles, and awkward prepositions within grammatical patterns, such as 'The position of women has been changed in my many societies', 'women take participate', 'women are independent to take their decision', and 'some company they paid a low salary'. These errors in grammar and punctuation occur frequently throughout the response, occasionally causing some difficulty for the reader. To improve, the writer should focus on mastering basic sentence structures, accurate verb forms, and prepositional usage.

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