Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

It is argued that the position of womens has change a great deal in many societies but these societes cannot claim to have achieved gender equality. I disagree with that argument because women play an important role in the devolpment of societies. womens work with mens in every field freely.

Firstly we argued that womens are the part of our society. in the societies where womens have no freedom are worse societies of the world .The societies where womens work freely are progressing in the world. some countries like America give equal rights to the womens. womens are the basic part of society that develop the society by teaching their child ggood morals.

secondly we explain as we don't gave equal right to the womens our economy collapse. womens work in every field with mans. so if we don't give respect and protection to womens they are unable to work freely. government should take strict action against that type of people which harassed the womens. The womens which do not go on job and remain home are teach our new generation. if we don't provide respect these women our generation can also develop bad moral .

The conculion is that without providing respect and equal rights to the womens the society cannot grow progress in any field. so providing equal rights to the womens is basically help in progressing the society. The women are work in every field from teaching to factory workers.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response addresses the task only minimally, as it falls short of the required 250-word minimum, containing only 243 words. The student attempts to discuss whether societies have achieved gender equality, stating disagreement because women play an important role in development. However, the position is not always clearly sustained throughout the essay, and the arguments are very limited and under-developed. Ideas such as economic collapse or child-rearing are introduced without sufficient expansion, explanation, or relevant examples. The response touches upon the prompt's theme tangentially rather than developing a fully structured argumentative essay, leading to a restricted evaluation for this criterion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organization with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but there is no clear overall progression. Paragraphing is attempted, but paragraph boundaries and internal structures are weak and disjointed. Cohesive devices are inadequate and repetitive, heavily relying on basic transitional words like 'Firstly', 'secondly', and 'The conculion is that', which are often used inaccurately. Referencing is also faulty in places, such as pronoun use and repetitive naming of subjects, which disrupts the logical flow of ideas and makes the progression hard to follow at times.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, utilizing words that are simple and often incorrect in form. There are frequent lexical errors, including word form and spelling mistakes such as 'womens' instead of women, 'change' instead of changed, 'societes' instead of societies, 'devolpment', 'ggood', 'gave', 'conculion', and 'harassed' where 'harass' is required. These errors and the limited range of vocabulary strain the reader and reflect a restricted ability to express ideas precisely or attempt less common lexical items accurately.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The range of grammatical structures is very limited, relying primarily on simple sentences with frequent errors. Attempts at complex or compound sentences are generally faulty, characterized by persistent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'womens work', 'societies has change', 'economy collapse'), missing articles, incorrect prepositions, and poor punctuation. Errors are frequent throughout the text, distorting meaning in several places and causing considerable difficulty for the reader to parse the intended grammatical relationships.

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