Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-08

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many countries, the position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality. I partially agree with this view because there are some women who are not allowed to work by their families and some people believe that children are the responsibility of mother but at the same time, there are several women who handle both family and work and almost an equal number of men and women are considered across all sectors.

Firstly, societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality because there are certain families who do not allow women to go out and work because of their culture. Older people have culture of encouraging women to become only a housewife. Thus, this culture prevents women to achieve gender equality. Additionally, some people believe that children are the responsibility of a mother and she should only focus on them instead of working in an industry. As a result, they are not hired as an employee in a company.

On the other hand, there are several women who handle family as well as work at the same time. These women are independent and can do an equal amount of work compared with men. For example, an woman can work as well as raise children at the same time. Furthermore, there has been an increment in the number of female employees in industries. Women are equally participating in all sectors and compete with men to get a promotion. Therefore, women are getting an equal support at work compared with men.

In conclusion, I partially agree that societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality because of their family culture and people's belief of preventing women from becoming an employee. However, there are several women who maintain work-life balance. In addition, there has been almost an equal number of men and women at work places.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

Your position is stated as partial agreement, and you give relevant reasons on both sides: family restrictions and expectations about childcare, alongside women’s participation in employment. The examples of women combining work and parenting and competing for promotion help address the question. However, the discussion remains general, and some claims are not sufficiently explained—for instance, the statement that women are “not hired as an employee” does not show how widespread this is or connect it clearly to society’s failure to achieve equality. The claim that workplaces have almost equal numbers of men and women is also asserted without evidence. Develop these points with specific examples and clarify how they support your overall judgement. The response includes 43 words copied from the task prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs, and a conclusion. The progression from barriers to women’s equality to evidence of progress is easy to follow, and signposts such as “Firstly,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” make the organisation clear. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some features of stronger organisation. To improve further, make the relationship between each example and your argument more explicit; for example, explain how women’s ability to balance work and family relates to equality in society, rather than simply presenting it as evidence of equal treatment. Some linking is mechanical, and repeated references to “women” and “gender equality” could be replaced with clearer pronouns or varied phrasing.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “gender equality,” “independent,” “participating,” and “promotion.” The meaning is generally clear, but the range is limited and several phrases are imprecise or unnatural, which keeps the vocabulary from being more flexible and precise. For example, “an increment in the number” is an awkward way to describe a rise, while “an equal support” does not express the intended idea naturally. “Culture of encouraging women” and “work in an industry” are also broad or unclear in context. Aim to use more accurate collocations and distinguish between equal participation, equal opportunities, and equal treatment. This will make your argument sound more precise without requiring unnecessarily complex vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “because,” “while,” and “that,” and most sentences communicate their meaning. Some grammatical errors remain, but they rarely prevent understanding. For example, “an woman” should be “a woman,” and “prevents women to achieve” needs a different verb pattern, such as “prevents women from achieving.” In “children are the responsibility of a mother,” the article and general reference are awkwardly handled; “children are a mother’s responsibility” would be more natural. There is also a subject–verb agreement issue in “people’s belief of preventing women,” where the construction needs restructuring. Practise accurate article use, verb patterns, and agreement while continuing to vary sentence structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.