Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In the past 50 years, the position of women has improved significantly in many societies. Women now have greater access to education, employment and political participation.However, I strongly agree that gender equality has not yet been fully archieved because women continue to face discrimination and unequal opportunities.

On the one hand, women have made considerable progress in different areas of life.In past, the women was not allowed to do any outside work, the women were expected to stay at home and take care of their families.Nowadays, they can persue higher education.Todays women are more different then the past women. For example, women in many countries work as doctor, engineer, nurse, teacher. Some countries have female presidents or prime ministers for their country.

On the other hand, significant gender inequalities still exist. One major problem is gender pay gap, as women in many countries are earn less then men for various reasons including occupational differences and diiscrimination. Morever, the women often have to balance their professional responsibilities with household duties and childcare. For instance, a working mother may spend several hours caring for her children and doing housework after completing a full day at work, while her male partner contribute less then women.

In conclusion. although the positions of the women has improved considerably over the last five years, i firmly believed that gender equality has not been compeletly archieved. Gonvernments and employers should permote equal pay, protects women rights and ensure that both genders have equal oppurtunities in education and employment.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction: you strongly agree that progress has not yet produced gender equality, and the conclusion restates this view. You address both sides of the prompt by describing women’s gains in education, work and politics, then discussing pay inequality and the unequal burden of childcare and housework. These are relevant points, and the working-mother example helps illustrate the second argument. However, some support remains general: the list of professions and mention of female leaders show progress but do not explain how far these changes have advanced equality. Develop one or two examples further, and clarify the causes or consequences of the inequalities, to make the discussion more fully supported.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, contrasting body paragraphs and a conclusion. The progression from women’s advances to continuing inequalities is easy to follow, and signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand” and “In conclusion” make the organisation explicit. This gives the essay a coherent arrangement, though cohesion is sometimes mechanical and paragraph development is uneven. For example, the first body paragraph moves quickly from past expectations to education, professions and political leaders without explaining the links between these examples. Some sentence boundaries are also unclear, as in “participation.However” and “life.In past,” which interrupts the flow. Use transitions more selectively and connect examples with clearer explanation and referencing.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “political participation,” “occupational differences,” “discrimination” and “professional responsibilities.” This gives you enough range to discuss the main issues, and some choices are appropriate for an academic essay. However, noticeable spelling and word-choice errors reduce precision, including “archieved,” “persue,” “diiscrimination” and “compeletly.” There are also awkward or inaccurate expressions such as “Todays women are more different then the past women” and “female presidents or prime ministers for their country.” Aim to use familiar vocabulary accurately before reaching for more complex phrasing, and check spelling and collocations carefully. More precise terms for the examples and inequalities would make the argument sound more controlled.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including a reason clause (“because women continue to face discrimination”) and a sentence explaining causes (“including occupational differences and diiscrimination”). The main ideas remain understandable, but errors in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence construction occur across the response. Examples include “the women was not allowed,” “women in many countries are earn less,” and “her male partner contribute less.” The conclusion also has agreement problems in “the positions of the women has improved.” Punctuation and capitalisation need attention, particularly the missing spaces after full stops and the lowercase “i.” Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and correctly formed verb, while retaining some complex structures.

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