Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Over the past 5 decades womens has changed in many societies. Women now have great access to education, employment and many other opportunities. i strongly agree that completly gnder can not be achieved because women still face difficulties and unequal treatment in your various area of life.

On one hand, women have made remarkable record in 5 decades and got more opportunities nore than the mens because they are very talented do things for their whole family. Nowdays, they parsue higher education, and build successful career and also participate in politics. For example, many womens work as doctor, engineer, teacher and business leaders. Moreover, government in many countries several laws of these womens to earn more monay and financial stable and give rights to and provide equal opportunities.

On the other hand,gender eqaulity reamins the major problem, In some places womens are paid less than men although they work both same these kinds of issues most common in many countries also they know she is working at their home for their family member. In addition, discrimination and gender based violence continue to afeect women protection and safety . Therefore, progress in women rights doesnot mena that equally has been fully achieved.

In conclusion, although the position of women has improved over the last 50 years, I completly agree that the gender equality remains same that would be never in important goal. Governments, employers and society must work together to eliminate discrimination and ensure that everyone enjoy equal rights and opportunities, regardless of gender.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear: you agree that progress has not yet produced gender equality, and the conclusion returns to this view. You address both sides by noting women’s gains in education, work and politics, then discussing unequal pay, discrimination and gender-based violence. These are relevant reasons, and the examples of women working as doctors, engineers and business leaders help illustrate change. However, some points are asserted rather than explained: the claim that women receive more opportunities than men is not supported, and the discussion of unequal pay and domestic responsibilities is difficult to follow. To strengthen the response, explain how each example demonstrates continuing inequality and develop the causes or consequences of one or two key issues more fully. The response already shows a clear, relevant argument, but support is uneven and sometimes unclear.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two contrasting body paragraphs signposted by “On one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a conclusion. This gives the reader a clear overall route through your argument, and the final paragraph appropriately summarises your position and recommendation. Some linking is effective, including “Moreover,” “In addition” and “Therefore.” However, connections within sentences are sometimes faulty or unclear, particularly in the sentence about women being paid less and working at home. Several ideas are joined together without clear punctuation, so the progression becomes difficult to follow. Use shorter sentences where needed, and make pronouns and references explicit. This would preserve the sound paragraph-level organisation while making cohesion less mechanical and more precise.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “higher education,” “successful career,” “discrimination,” “gender-based violence” and “equal rights and opportunities.” These choices show awareness of the subject and allow the main argument to be understood. However, spelling and word-choice errors are frequent and sometimes make the reader pause, as in “womens,” “gnder,” “eqaulity,” “rema ins” and “monay.” Some phrases are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “made remarkable record,” “financial stable” and “gender equality remains same.” Aim to learn accurate forms and common collocations as complete phrases, rather than translating word by word. More precise wording for the claims about pay, domestic work and legal protections would also help you express your ideas clearly and consistently.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a mixture of simple and more complex sentences, including a concession in “although the position of women has improved” and a reason introduced by “because.” This gives the response some structural variety. However, control is inconsistent, and errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles and punctuation often make the meaning harder to follow. For example, “women still face difficulties and unequal treatment in your various area of life” has unclear agreement and reference, while “although they work both same” is not a complete, well-formed comparison. The long sentence beginning “In some places” also needs clearer clause boundaries. Practise building accurate basic sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and comparisons. Check subject–verb agreement, singular and plural forms, and sentence punctuation during revision.

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