Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The position of women has changed in a great amount over the period of last 50 year. I believe that this gender equality have achieved in such a long period.

I toally Agree with this statement because women in the past are not treated well and they dont have opportunities as compare to men, Meanwhile mens in the past have multiple opportunites like they used to go for war, or for job, to earn money.

Overall, womens in the past are only housewife or maids and daycare of the children, But in the last 50 years time has changed alot and womens are getting more opportunites as compare to men, Women;s are dominating in every field like technology,engineering, medical etc. In the early 2000's gender equality was not a main figure to focus on but after the corona pandemic this issue has arise and become a main concern.

In addition, Society in the early 2000's are not accepting gender equality and they think that gender equality does not even exist. But now people mindset have changed, Their view of thinking changed.

Womens are more intelligent than before and they are demanding their rights in every aspect of life ,for example in the current period influencers on the social media are criticising men and blaming them for what they have done to the women in the past, But this criticism turns into a fight between men and women which then turns into a hate, In Past ,There are only two genders in society but now there are multiple.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You state a position in the opening—“I believe that this gender equality have achieved”—and give examples of changes in women’s roles, such as entering technology, engineering and medicine. However, the position is unclear and does not directly answer the claim in the prompt: you appear to agree that equality has been achieved, while the task asks whether societies still cannot claim to have achieved it. The examples are mostly broad assertions rather than explained evidence, and the discussion of social-media criticism and the number of genders does not clearly support your argument about equality. To strengthen the response, state your view precisely and develop relevant points about continuing inequalities, such as pay, leadership or unequal domestic responsibilities, with specific explanations or examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response has separate paragraphs and uses basic signposts such as “Overall” and “In addition,” so the reader can identify a general movement from past conditions to the present. However, ideas are not arranged into a clear argument: the opening claim is followed by historical examples, then broad claims about women’s progress, and finally a discussion of online conflict and gender categories. These points do not build consistently toward a conclusion, and there is no concluding paragraph that restates your position. Some links, including “But” and “In addition,” connect sentences without clarifying how the ideas relate. Organise the essay around two or three reasons that support one clear answer, and use each paragraph to explain one reason and its relevance.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the general subject, including “opportunities,” “gender equality,” “dominating,” and “demanding their rights.” There are also attempts at more specific terms, such as “influencers” and “pandemic.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or repetitive, which sometimes makes the intended meaning less clear. For example, “gender equality have achieved” does not express the intended idea naturally, and “main figure to focus on” is unclear in this context. Frequent spelling errors, including “toally,” “opportunites” and “alot,” also reduce control. Build a more precise vocabulary for discussing inequality and check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple sentences and longer structures, including a sentence beginning “because” and examples introduced with “for example.” This shows some effort to vary sentence forms, but control is inconsistent, and errors occur frequently enough to make parts of the response difficult to follow. Examples include “this gender equality have achieved,” “Society … are not accepting,” and “people mindset have changed,” where subject–verb agreement or sentence construction is faulty. Tense and article use are also inconsistent, as in “women in the past are not treated well.” Long sentences, particularly the final one, combine several ideas without clear punctuation. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and past-tense forms, and divide complex ideas into shorter, correctly punctuated sentences.

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