Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

I am not agreed with the society because the position of women has also necessary as like as the position of men in society. Without women the society cannot completed. Women give born to baby after this become a society. But in our society it is very necessary to give equlity. We never forget that in last fifty year women have prove that they are equal to men. We accept the thing that women has also do those task which some time can'nt perform by the men. In the whole world the developed country are accept gender equality in mankind. In the day of ignorance the people treat the women as his servent. But now a day the whole world treat the women as equal as men because as we gaining knowlege our mind accept the place of women in the society. Now a day women work with men to invert some things and also study and they help the person to make their country powerful. The example of the China is truly example the gender equality in the worid. This show that women are not less than men. In his country she work together with men and help them to make their life peaceful life. A women make the home a pradise. The purpose of describing these thing to clear the fact that we cannot servive without the help of women in sociaty. We believe that these things are describe to society and give knownlegde to society of the importance of gender equality is helpful to improve themslf thinging.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

You take a position that women should be treated equally and refer to changes over the past fifty years, women’s work and education, and China. These points are relevant to the topic. However, the response only minimally addresses the central claim: it does not clearly explain whether societies have or have not achieved equality, and it gives little evidence of continuing inequality or a reasoned comparison of progress with remaining gaps. Statements such as “women are not less than men” and “we cannot survive without the help of women” assert their value but do not establish the extent of equality. Develop a direct position and support it with specific examples, such as differences in pay, leadership, or access to opportunities, while explaining how these relate to the question.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a general movement from the importance of women to their contributions in society, and phrases such as “But now a day” and “The example of China” attempt to connect ideas. However, the response is presented as one long paragraph, so the reader cannot easily distinguish an introduction, supporting points, and a conclusion. Ideas also repeat or shift without clear links: the claims about childbirth, equality, women’s work, and making the home a “paradise” are not organised into a developing argument. Some references, including “these things” and “them,” are unclear. Use separate paragraphs for your position, each main reason, and the conclusion, and make each paragraph develop one point with explicit links between claim and example.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “gender equality,” “developed country,” “society,” and “knowledge,” so the subject is generally recognisable. However, the range is basic and several expressions are repeated or used in ways that strain understanding. Examples include “the position of women has also necessary,” “invert some things,” and “make their life peaceful life”; these do not communicate the intended ideas precisely. Spelling errors such as “equlity,” “servive,” and “sociaty” also reduce clarity. Build a more accurate set of phrases for discussing equality and social change, and check spelling and collocations. For instance, describe women as “contributing to innovation” rather than saying they “invert some things.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response mainly uses simple statements, with a few attempts to connect clauses using “because,” “after,” and “that.” However, grammatical errors occur frequently and sometimes make the intended meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “I am not agreed,” “the society cannot completed,” “Women give born to baby,” and “the developed country are accept gender equality.” These show problems with verb forms, sentence construction, agreement, and articles. There are also unclear sentence boundaries, particularly in the opening and final sentences, where several ideas are joined without a clear structure. Practise forming accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add subordinate clauses only when you can control their grammar. Review past-tense forms, articles, and singular/plural agreement.

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