Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

The last 5 decades showed a significant change in the status of women in several societies. Despite these changes, many of these societies cannot claim that they have attained gender equality. For some compelling reasons that I will outline in this essay, I agree to this statement greatly.

To begin with, although there have been noticable improvements in women employment, they still tend to face certain obstacles when looking for a job. Their pay scale is less, and they are often judged on their personal life, being married for instance, rather than their professional skillset. A case in point is my own sister, who has been repeatedly asked in the interviews if she is single before being shortlisted. On the contrary, you will hardly find any men experiencing these discriminations in the corporate. Thus, I feel it is not possible to claim that these societies have reached gender equality.

In addition, many women are still not given the freedom to make decisions for their own life. Be it marriage, education, or pursuing a specific career, they are often told to holdback, and follow their fathers, brothers or husbands, so that their honor is maintained. The last few months in Pakistan reported many such cases in which women were killed by their husband, merely because they wanted something different for themselves. The irony is that it's the same for both elite and middle class societies. Having witnessed these cases on daily basis, I believe societies still have a long way to go to attain gender equality.

Lastly, a majority of women are still deprived of basic and higher education, especially in developing countries like Pakistan. While the percentage of women pursuing graduate and post graduate degrees has increased greatly over the last 50 years, many communities still consider it useless for women to study because their ultimate job is to take care of the household. To illustrate, even my own cousins were not allowed to study past intermediate because they had to get married. My male cousins, on the other hand, had no such restrictions and were given freedom to study further. Seeing these differences even in 21th century make it clear that gender equality is still nowhere to be found.

To conclude, while the position of women has improved a lot in several societies over the last 50 years, I assert that the claim of achieving gender equality can not be made yet, because women are still not given equal rights and opportunities, in their own households, personal as well as professional life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 7.0

Your position is clear throughout: you strongly agree that societies have not achieved gender equality, and you address employment, personal autonomy, and education. Each main point is supported with relevant examples, including your sister’s job interviews and your cousins’ education, which helps extend the argument. This fits a response that addresses all parts and supports its ideas. However, some claims are broad—for example, that men “hardly” experience these forms of discrimination—and the discussion of reported killings could explain more explicitly how this illustrates unequal rights. Develop the evidence and reasoning behind such claims, and qualify generalisations where appropriate, to make the argument more consistently precise and fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, three body paragraphs present distinct reasons, and the conclusion restates the position. Sequencing phrases such as “To begin with,” “In addition,” and “Lastly” make the progression easy to follow, and examples are generally placed beside the point they support. This coherent arrangement meets the lower-band expectations and shows some features of stronger organisation. At times, however, linking is mechanical, and phrases such as “On the contrary” do not express the intended contrast particularly precisely. Some references, including “these societies” and “these cases,” could also be more specific. Use transitions that show the exact relationship between ideas and connect examples back to the argument more explicitly.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of vocabulary to discuss the topic, including “gender equality,” “professional skillset,” “pursuing a specific career,” and “deprived of basic and higher education.” These choices communicate the main ideas clearly, and some less common expressions show an attempt to write in an appropriately formal style. However, several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “agree to this statement greatly,” “in the corporate,” and “holdback.” There are also spelling or form issues, including “noticable” and “21th.” These do not prevent understanding, but they limit precision and naturalness. Focus on accurate collocations and check spelling and word forms during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including subordinate clauses in “although there have been… improvements” and the contrast structure “while the position… has improved.” Most sentences communicate their meaning, and the paragraph-level argument remains understandable. Some grammatical errors nevertheless occur. For example, “many women are still not given the freedom to make decisions for their own life” has a number mismatch, while “Seeing these differences… make it clear” has a subject–verb agreement error. The sentence beginning “Be it marriage, education…” is also not smoothly integrated into its surrounding sentence. Review agreement, singular and plural forms, and sentence construction, then proofread punctuation and articles to improve control while retaining your range of structures.

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