Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Nowadays, feminism and gender equality is a widely debated topic. Although the position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years, these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality. I strongly agree with this statement primarily because of the existence of hidden patriarchy and misogynistic obligations on women in the name of religion.

To begin with, patriarchy is a strong factor existing in the society since ages which make every rule of society in favor of men by default. A broad category of people even does not realise they are supporting patriarchy as it is normalised in the primary view. For instance, a father taking care of his child is considered as good father, while a women taking care of her child is conidered as duty.

Furthermore, some countries are using religion as a tool to obligate women with restrictions in their dressing and even in their fundamental rights such as stepping outside of house and taking important decision of their life. For example, muslim countries like afganistan are repriving women of their basic right such as education.

In conclusion, I firmly agree that societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality because of silent patriarchy existing in the society and the religious miogynstic approach.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

Your position is clear: you strongly agree that societies have not achieved gender equality, and you give two relevant reasons—everyday patriarchal expectations and restrictions justified through religion. The examples about childcare and Afghan women’s access to education help connect these points to the question. However, the response addresses the task only partially because both arguments are brief and largely asserted rather than explained or supported in depth; the conclusion mainly repeats the introduction. The response is 179 words, 71 words below the 250-word minimum, and 34 words copied from the prompt were not counted. Develop each reason with further explanation and a specific example, and use the additional space to show more fully why these inequalities persist.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction states your view, two body paragraphs present separate reasons, and a conclusion restates your position. Signposting such as “To begin with,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” makes the progression easy to follow. This coherent structure is a strength. However, the development within each paragraph is quite short, so the links between a claim and its implications are not always fully established. For example, the point about different expectations of fathers and mothers would benefit from an explanation of how this reflects unequal social roles. The final paragraph also repeats earlier wording rather than drawing the arguments together. Extend the reasoning and use clearer references between ideas to make cohesion less dependent on formulaic transitions.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant topic vocabulary, including “gender equality,” “patriarchy,” “restrictions,” and “fundamental rights,” which allows you to communicate your main concerns. There are also attempts at more specific phrasing, such as “normalised” and “in the name of religion.” However, the range is limited, and several inaccurate or misspelled choices weaken precision, including “conidered,” “repriving,” and “miogynstic.” Some expressions are also awkward or imprecise, such as “a broad category of people” and “primary view.” Aim to use a wider range of accurate collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise wording would make your examples and claims clearer without changing your central argument.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple statements and some more complex structures, including the concession beginning “Although the position of women has changed…” and the reason clause “because of the existence…”. The main ideas remain understandable, and paragraph-level sentence control is generally adequate. However, errors in agreement and sentence construction recur: “feminism and gender equality is” should use a plural verb, while “which make every rule” does not agree with its singular subject. The sentence beginning “A broad category of people even does not realise…” is also awkwardly formed. There are some article, plural, and punctuation issues, including “outside of house” and inconsistent comma spacing. Practise checking subject–verb agreement and building longer sentences around one clear main clause.

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