Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent times,the leadership of women has changed and motivated some individuals in the society over the years.However,the societies can't claim to have gotten a result of gender equality.In this essay i would be agreeing that in most societies today there haven't been any benefit of gender equaliy even with the level of succesful women.

In the past,it was believed that women are inferior to men,the weaker gender and their place is in the kitchen,even not being allowed to go to school as it was said to be a waste of resources until mordenism came in and everything changed but,even with the changes there is still the argument that a woman should be under a man and,if she's not she's a nobody,therefore no proof of gender equality as she is being judged by the society.However,most women today tends to concentrate on theirselves and sources of income as they decenter men which is known as a self improvement and ignoring the negative pressures from the society.

Marriage has always been seen as an achievement from the society for a woman ignoring the fact that there are only few responsible men which are rare,and then putting on negative pressure on the lady which might make her end up with the wrong person for a lifetime.Considering the fact that men tends to benefit more from the marriage than for the woman it is only wise to ignore the society and build up yourself with businesses and mental growth,making it easier to make the right decision without being pressured.While,these are challenges the women face the men on the other hand tends to be left and worshipped by the society as they are seen as the higher gender,they tend not to value marriage compared to women,the fact most men today get married to get an heir and still misbehave because his a man is something to be concerned about.

In Conclusion,even with the modernism of the society and positions of women in the current days there has been no achievement of gender equality as the society is misogynistic and popular beliefs of every lady respecting and submitting under a man.In other words,no matter how successful a lady is seen to be in the society she is still an inferior to a man.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you agree that societies have not achieved gender equality, and the conclusion reinforces this view. You address social expectations, women’s education and economic independence, and unequal attitudes to marriage, so the response remains relevant to the question. However, some points are asserted rather than explained. For example, the claim that men benefit more from marriage and that women are pressured into unsuitable relationships would be stronger with a specific example or explanation of how these patterns demonstrate inequality. The discussion also focuses heavily on marriage and social judgement, while other dimensions—such as pay, leadership opportunities or sharing domestic work—receive little attention. Develop a broader range of reasons and support each with concrete examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion, and the ideas generally relate to the central argument. However, progression within the body paragraphs is difficult to follow because several different claims are packed into very long sentences. The second body paragraph moves from marriage expectations to men’s behaviour and then to women’s self-development without clearly showing how each point connects. Linking words such as “However,” “therefore” and “In other words” are used, but some transitions feel mechanical or do not clarify the relationship between ideas. Use shorter, more focused paragraphs or sentences, with one main point developed at a time, and make references such as “these challenges” explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You communicate the main topic using relevant vocabulary, including “gender equality,” “negative pressure,” “self improvement” and “misogynistic.” There are also attempts to express more specific social ideas, such as women being judged by society. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning less clear. For instance, “the leadership of women has changed” does not clearly express the intended change in women’s social position, and “gotten a result of gender equality” is unnatural. Spelling and word-form errors such as “equaliy,” “succesful” and “mordenism” also affect accuracy. Build a bank of precise topic vocabulary and check collocations and spelling during revision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “even with,” “as” and “which,” and your overall meaning can usually be understood. However, long sentences often contain several grammatical problems, making relationships between ideas harder to follow. Examples include “most women today tends,” where the subject and verb do not agree, and “men tends to be left,” which has the same agreement issue. There are also problems with articles, pronouns and sentence boundaries, as in “because his a man,” and the opening contains a run-on transition between “over the years” and “However.” Aim for more controlled sentence lengths, check subject–verb agreement and pronoun forms, and use full stops to separate complete ideas.

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