Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Summit Mastery · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

The position of women has changed a great deal in many societies over the past 50 years. But these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The role of women has changed in many cocieties over the past 50 years but these societies cannot claim to have achieved gender equality. I strongly agreed with it that the societies cannot agree with gender equality but the women's role had been changed with time .

Firstly, the women's role has been changed in our societies .Now they became independent due to their hardwork in their work and studies .Today, most of the women can do government jobs for their indeendency . Therefore , the position of women has changed a great deal in many societies . But the people cannot trust women .For example . one of my relative's doughter became doctor and brought a big change in our family because she is the first doctor in her family . But she did not do any job because people cannot trust her .

Secondly, the insecurity of women is a big problem for women . This is because the women are physically weak that is natural and they cannot protect themselves . Therefore, the women cannot achieved gender equality . For example , one of my friend's sister cannot complete her study because the institute is far from her home and she was not in any secourty in this intitute . This is the big problem in our societies that cannot agreed with gender equality .

In concculition , there are two big problem in achieving gender equality that are insecrity of women and having no intrust on them . These are the biggest issue in these societies .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You take a clear position that gender equality has not been achieved and give two relevant reasons: women’s employment choices may be restricted by distrust, and safety concerns can limit education. The examples about the relative who became a doctor and your friend’s sister help connect these points to real situations. However, the reasons are only briefly explained, and the claim that women are “physically weak” is a broad generalisation rather than a developed explanation of inequality. The response also does not fully explore how women’s position has changed or address the extent of your agreement in depth. It is 234 words, so it falls 16 words short of the 250-word minimum; the 27 words copied from the prompt are not counted. Develop each main point with clearer explanation and a more specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs signalled by “Firstly” and “Secondly,” and a conclusion. This helps the reader identify your main points, and examples are placed alongside the relevant arguments. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear: the first paragraph moves from independence and government jobs to distrust without fully explaining the connection. Linking phrases such as “Therefore” are repeated and occasionally make the reasoning feel mechanical, while “For example” is followed by a fragment-like sentence in one place. The conclusion repeats the two problems but does not bring the argument together. Use clearer links between claim, explanation, and example, and make each paragraph develop one central idea.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “gender equality,” “independent,” “insecurity,” and “position of women.” Some phrases, such as “brought a big change in our family,” also attempt to express a specific impact. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which can make meaning less precise: “do government jobs for their indeendency” and “not in any secourty” are difficult to interpret. Repetition of “women,” “problem,” and “big” also limits flexibility. Spelling errors such as “cocieties,” “doughter,” and “concculition” are noticeable. Build a more accurate set of phrases for employment, social attitudes, and personal safety, and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use mostly simple sentences and make some attempts to connect ideas with subordinate clauses, for example, “This is because…” and “because she is the first doctor in her family.” These structures help convey reasons and examples. However, the range remains limited, and errors occur frequently in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence construction. Examples include “I strongly agreed” where the present position calls for “agree,” “the women cannot achieved,” and “there are two big problem.” Punctuation and spacing are also inconsistent, as in “societies .Now,” and some full stops interrupt the sentence flow. Practise accurate present-tense statements and plural forms, then combine ideas into longer sentences while checking that each clause is complete.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.