Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Obesity has become a major challenge in some societies. Some individuals believe that advertising junk food is the root cause of obesity and so it should be banned. I concur with people who argue that junk food advertising does not contribute to the issue of obesity because people have the power to choose what to eat without any influence so advertising should not be prohibited.

On the one hand, people are attracted to what they see. Advertising fast food on televisions and showing off how delicious they are, will influence peoples' appetite instantly. Many adverts always depict unhealthy foods as meals that one can access easily after a long day without too much struggle. Therefore people with busy schedules will fall for this trap and before they realise it they are fully addicted to certain way of eating. As a result, individuals find themselves having poor eating habits because of advertising junk foods and these habits may lead to obesity. So governments should officially ban the advertisements.

On the other hand, choices are made by individuals.People should not blame advertising because no one fully forces them to pick a meal they want to eat. When an individual wants to make a decision, they should be aware that there are consequences that follow. Therefore, they have the mandate to regulate whatever they eat by themselves. For example, a deep fried potato crips advert cannot force an individual to eat it not unless they had a desire to do so from within.

In conclusion, although advertising may influence someone's decision to choose what to feed on , I believe that choices are personal and people should be careful when making them. So, advertising should not be prohibited because people have no personal regulations.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You discuss both views and state your position clearly: you argue that advertising may influence eating but that individuals remain responsible, so it should not be banned. The first body paragraph explains how appealing adverts can affect busy people’s choices, while the second gives the personal-responsibility argument. However, the two sides are not developed equally: the case for banning adverts includes a cause-and-effect explanation, whereas the opposing view relies mainly on individual choice and a brief example. The conclusion also says people should be careful, then claims they have “no personal regulations,” which conflicts with your point that they can regulate their own eating. Clarify this idea and support both positions with more specific reasoning or evidence.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, one paragraph for each view, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” make the progression easy to follow. Within paragraphs, ideas generally move from a claim to an explanation or example. However, some linking is mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “Therefore” and “As a result,” and the conclusion’s final point does not connect clearly with the earlier argument about personal responsibility. Improve cohesion by varying transitions and using clearer references between claims and examples. Ensure each paragraph develops one central point and that the conclusion accurately summarises the position established in the body.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “obesity,” “advertising,” “unhealthy foods,” “eating habits,” and “consequences.” Phrases such as “busy schedules” and “poor eating habits” help explain the issue, and the meaning is generally clear. There are also attempts at more expressive language, such as “fall for this trap,” though this is somewhat informal for an academic essay. Some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward, including “showing off how delicious they are,” “fully addicted to certain way of eating,” and “personal regulations.” Spelling and word-form slips such as “crips” also reduce precision. Aim for more formal, natural combinations and check spelling; this would make your arguments sound more controlled and precise.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple and complex sentence forms, including a conditional structure in “When an individual wants to make a decision…” and a concession in the conclusion beginning “although.” Most sentences remain understandable, but some grammatical and punctuation errors recur. For example, “Advertising fast food on televisions and showing off how delicious they are, will influence…” has an unclear subject and an unnecessary comma, while “People should not blame advertising because no one fully forces them…” needs a space after the full stop before it. In “before they realise it they are fully addicted,” punctuation is needed to separate the introductory clause. Review sentence boundaries, agreement, articles, and punctuation, and practise building complex sentences with clear subjects and clauses.

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