Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · IELTS Momentum Workout · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In some societies, obesity is regarded as a major problem. Some people believe that junk food advertising is largely to blame for this problem and should be banned. However, others feel that junk food advertising does not contribute to the problem of obesity and should not be banned.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

You should use your own ideas, knowledge and experience·and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence. Write at least 250 words.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Obesity has been a major problem anywhere in the world particularly in communites where food production is sufficient.

Overall, junk food advertising should not be blamed largely because there are other factors that contribute to this weight problem.

Some people believe that junk food advertising is to be blamed since it is visible everywhere in a community where all types of media is available. In a digital age, just one click from a delivery app can satisfy someone's cravings. The algorithm in the technology brings you anything that you see in social media. Food delivery applications offer enticing discounts and vouchers just to let people buy something they do not really want. Food merchants also create interesting promos for their consumers. Marketing strategists devise a lot of things just to hook people to buy from their products.

On the other hand, food advertising should not be banned just because there is an increase in statistics for obese people. Some people choose to make eating a hobby just because they have nothing else to do. One example was during the pandemic when people were stucked inside of their homes and were trying to do all kinds of hobbies they come across the internet. While others tried to be busy with gardening and online shopping, others enjoyed eating because they have nothing else to do.

One experience that I can share as a teacher was when we were done with our online class during that era, my colleagues and I would order snacks from fastfood such as milk teas and processed foods. Eating has been our go-to activity whenever we were done with our tasks for the day.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response gives a clear overall view that advertising should not be blamed largely and presents reasons on both sides: advertising can influence choices through social media and delivery-app promotions, while personal habits and inactivity can also contribute to obesity. The pandemic example adds relevant personal support. However, the discussion is only partial: the opposing view is described mainly through advertising’s visibility and promotions, without explaining in depth how this leads to obesity, and the case against a ban is not fully distinguished from the claim that advertising is not the main cause. The conclusion is also implicit rather than clearly restating your position. Develop both arguments more directly and explain why your examples support your judgement.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an opening position, a paragraph about advertising, and a contrasting paragraph about personal behaviour. Phrases such as “On the other hand” help signal the shift between views, and the examples generally follow the points they illustrate. However, progression is limited: the final paragraph adds a personal anecdote but does not clearly connect it back to the broader argument or provide a concluding synthesis. Some links between ideas are also loose, particularly the move from advertising’s availability to the claim that it should not be blamed. Use clearer topic sentences and explain the relationship between each example and the main point; finish with a concise conclusion that brings the two views together.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a reasonably varied set of topic-related vocabulary, including “algorithm,” “enticing discounts,” “marketing strategists,” “obese,” and “processed foods.” These choices make the discussion understandable and show some ability to describe modern advertising and eating habits. There are, however, several imprecise or unnatural expressions, such as “food production is sufficient,” “hook people to buy from their products,” and “make eating a hobby.” Spelling and word-form slips such as “communites” and “stucked” also reduce accuracy. Aim for more precise collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, describe advertising as “encouraging consumers to purchase” rather than saying it hooks them “to buy from” a business.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response includes both straightforward sentences and attempts at more complex structures, such as “Some people believe that … since …” and the sentence beginning “While others tried to be busy…”. Most ideas remain understandable, but errors in agreement, verb forms, and sentence construction are noticeable. For instance, “all types of media is available” should use a plural verb, and “people were stucked” has an incorrect past participle. The sentence beginning “One example was during the pandemic when…” is awkwardly constructed, while “whenever we were done with our tasks” shifts into a past-time frame that could be expressed more consistently. Practise accurate subordinate clauses and review subject–verb agreement and past-tense forms while retaining your attempts at complex sentences.

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